511
‘It went nuts’: Thousands join UK parents calling for smartphone-free childhood
(www.theguardian.com)
this post was submitted on 17 Feb 2024
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I’ve put through kids through secondary and have two more to go. I universally regret giving them a smartphone at year 7. For the first one we fought valiantly - we said no; she and one other girl in her whole year didn’t have a smart phone. Within 6 months it became clear that she was missing out on a lot of events by not having a phone. We caved in and bought one of those neutered android phones meant for younger people - it sucked and basically didn’t work. After 9 months we got her a used iPhone.
It was also the wrong thing to do. Social media immediately starts shaping them and we still have restrictions on which networks they can go on. She can pry Instagram out of my cold dead hands; that site is liquid poison for a young girl.
I decided to go in the other direction. My two boys got their phones at 7 and 8. I put parental controls on it and never allowed them install apps. Most annoying is the extensive use of Youtube so far, but on the other hand both of them are speaking English and have good grades. The usage is limited to 2 hours a day. And at 9pm the phone locks itself.
However, I talked to them about social media and blocked Whatsapp, Instagram etc. I still need to talk more to them of course, because it's a risk for adults, too. They are individuals and I respect that they need to have fun after school. And I want them not to be "cool" online, but generally be happy with their lifes.
Honestly I think this is the way to go. You can only avoid it for so long. Rather than trying to stop them it's probably more effective teaching them control and how to navigate this flood of potentially dangerous influences.
Yes, if you always need to tell your kid what to do, it's all your job. Teach them to think like you think. It saves a lot of work and is less stressful.