this post was submitted on 10 Oct 2023
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Not The Onion

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We're not The Onion! Not affiliated with them in any way! Not operated by them in any way! All the news here is real!

The Rules

Posts must be:

  1. Links to news stories from...
  2. ...credible sources, with...
  3. ...their original headlines, that...
  4. ...would make people who see the headline think, “That has got to be a story from The Onion, America’s Finest News Source.”

Comments must abide by the server rules for Lemmy.world and generally abstain from trollish, bigoted, or otherwise disruptive behavior that makes this community less fun for everyone.

And that’s basically it!

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We've been getting some weird posts lately that... Well, they're not making me think it's gotta be an Onion headline, that's for sure.

So just a little refresher. Posts should be:

  1. Links to news stories from…
  2. …credible sources, with…
  3. …their original headlines, that…
  4. …would make people who see the headline think, “That has got to be a story from The Onion, America’s Finest News Source.”

If it's not Onion-y, it doesn't belong here. Bizarre, horrific, and violent news can be here if the headline reads like something out of The Onion, but if it doesn't, it's going away. And if there's too much non-Onion-like content from an account, that account is going away, too.

If you're not sure whether the real news headline you've found is like The Onion, here's a few sample Onion headlines from today:

  • "Visiting Friend Pleasantly Surprised By City’s Open Hostility Toward Homeless People"
  • "Increasingly Powerful Trans Person Capable Of Using Every Single Bathroom At Once"
  • "Man Feels Like Bystanders Are Arguing For Him To Put Gun Down In Bad Faith"
  • "Wally The Emotional Support Alligator Went To See The Phillies"
  • ‘New York Times’ Issues Apology For Reporting Palestinian Deaths

See? Find headlines from real news outlets that remind you of headlines like those. And just to prove my point: One of them is real.

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[–] moosetwin@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

ah, yes, the real one is the omnipotent trans person

[–] kescusay@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago
[–] zero_spelled_with_an_ecks@programming.dev 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Glad the Phillies were more welcoming to Wally than the Pirates.

[–] ech@lemm.ee 2 points 1 year ago

Can you blame them? Pirates have a fraught history with Crocodilia.

[–] Summzashi@lemmy.one 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Thank you. The amount of regular American politics here got waaaaay out of hand.

[–] kescusay@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago

Yeah, although the real trigger for this was the Uttar Pradesh posts. They had zero Onion-y content.