this post was submitted on 09 Dec 2023
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I've seen plenty of short men date taller women. And I have a mate who is 5'4" but managed to sleep with a 5'6" coworker.
It's not always about the height or muscles. It's the confidence.
Dating apps are bad and superficial. You're better off going out more in real life. People in person are less judgemental than in apps. And even if a girl rejects you-- either on apps or in real life-- who cares? If someone doesn't like you, they can bugger off. You're not under obligation to please everyone. There are plenty of fishes in the sea.
Just wondering, where would I go in real life? I can't really go to the bar, and the thought of approaching someone in like, a cafe, is horrifying (I'm trans so super worried about being seen as a creep)
I don't really have advise for lgbt as I am straight so my experience may not necessarily be accurate for you. But I think it's safe to say that the broad process on how to meet others for potential partner is universal regardless of gender. I admit I'm far from being Casanova, but people in bars or clubs who are interested send signals, like eye contact, smiling, inviting you to the dance floor, etc. It sets queue that you can approach them without looking creepy. But that's not even foolproof because sometimes a person may only be looking for attention as he/she may have a partner all along.
Another avenue to meet people would be taking part in social clubs and interest groups. You would be sharing common interests so it would be easier to have conversations. Hobby groups and social clubs don't usually involve alcohol so if you're not into drinking then that's a good way to meet people.
See if you can find LGBT meet up groups if your area. Don't approach them looking for dates, go just to meet new people and make new friends. Swap contact details, go to events and gatherings with em. Go bowling, play pool, find arcades, go to shows, conventions, try new restaurants, go hiking, go fishing, that sorta thing. You'll make new friends and that'll be fulfilling in its own right and some of those friendships may become something more than that.
Edit: This is largely great advice for straight, cis people, too. Buuuut find a different meet up group or skip it and just go to the events and make friends. You can usually start up a conversation just by sitting at a bar and having a few drinks.
Also: for the topic, the height thing is BS. Sure, some people will disregard you because of your height, but some people are assholes. Many, arguably most, aren't. I'm 5'5" and I've never been single unless I wanted to be since the age of about 15.