Selfhosted
A place to share alternatives to popular online services that can be self-hosted without giving up privacy or locking you into a service you don't control.
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I ran an ejabberd node on an old x86 for years for family and some close friends. Works great.
Then I got tired of maintaining devices after long days at work doing IT things. We talked. Signal is easier. We moved over to that, in the end.
A Pi3 1GB will easily scale to 4 people.and beyond. XMPP is really lightweight for text and images. Consider a Pi4 for voice or video though.
Yep, had ejabberd running on a Pi 3 with all the XEPs supported by Conversations enabled and various transports. 4 or 5 people at times. No problems at all - with chat and memes, that is. Never tried video or voice calls, but I don't think they require much work from the Pi itself.
However, similar to @solidgrue@lemmy.world, in a bout of simplifying my life I decided to nix the setup as all people involved also had one or more of Threema, Signal or Telegram anyways.