this post was submitted on 21 Feb 2024
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[–] BloodSlut@lemmy.world 195 points 9 months ago (9 children)

"twitter (which is currently named x)"

amazing

[–] jtk@lemmy.sdf.org 9 points 9 months ago (2 children)

It won't always be called X. 2027: Elon buys a domain registrar. 2031: Elon buys unicode. 2032: Elon allows unicode in domain names. The same day, Elon adds an "Xtreme X" emoji to unicode (it sort of looks like it's spinning, xtreme style), and registers the domain.

[–] abhibeckert@lemmy.world 26 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (1 children)

I'm hoping for something like:

  • 2024: Elon is found guilty of failing to uphold the obligations imposed on Twitter back in their 2011 lawsuit around misuse of information; Former Twitter staff are found to have heroically attempted to follow the law but were fired for doing so; Elon is ordered to sell X
  • 2025: Mastodon buys it for five million dollars; Elon is forced to sell all his shares in Tesla/SpaceX to pay a $200b fine to the FTC (his net worth is $201b, so he'd still be filthy rich - important to make the fine actually payable so he can't declare bankruptcy);
  • late 2025: Mastodon rebrands X to Twitter which becomes just another Fediverse instance. One that is popular among high profile celebrities who can pay a fee to have their identity verified. One where posting discriminatory content gets you banned, permanently. Anyone who retweets your post is also banned for a month.
  • 2026: FTC sets gets to use all $200 billion on their own budget in order to hire more staff and do their job properly going forward
  • 2027 into the foreseeable future: every company in America suddenly starts pro-actively obeying FTC regulations instead of waiting for enforcement actions that almost never happen due to a lack of funding.
[–] IndyRap@lemmy.world 9 points 9 months ago

Man I love me a good fiction book lol

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