Selfhosted
A place to share alternatives to popular online services that can be self-hosted without giving up privacy or locking you into a service you don't control.
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Native, docker, something else? How starved are you at the moment?
If I went with a shared service I would run it natively on Debian Stable.
Lemmy currently uses a dockerised PostgreSQL service. I've got 16 GB RAM which is currently mostly occupied by both MariaDB and the PostgreSQL Docker.
Have you tried limiting the RAM usage of those containers? They tend to use as much as you give them, which is all of it by default.
That was more or less the default of the PostgreSQL container and it ran like ass because I don't have a SSD.
Basically I had to give MySQL a ton of RAM for Nextcloud and PostgreSQL for Lemmy. For now I've put both on the same PostgreSQL instance and let them battle out who gets the assigned RAM by themselves.