Criteria: I'm looking for instances that are defed' with the Big 3 tankies (lemmygrad, lemmy.ml, and hexbear). I have no interest in trying to persuade my friends to create an acc and set up instance blocks before diving in, or dealing with the feedback when they run into the tankie brigade.

Edit: lemmy.cafe and infosec.pub seem to fit. I also find it really interesting just how many of the replies totally ignored my stated criteria.

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[+] misk@sopuli.xyz -16 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (1 children)

Title: „Which reasonably sized instance to recommend newcomers?”

Criteria: „I have no interest in trying to persuade my friends to create an acc and set up instance blocks before diving in”

OP: „but what about me”

[–] AwesomeLowlander@sh.itjust.works 18 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (1 children)

Yes, let's just ignore the entire text body? I know there's a joke about never reading the article, but this is a level above that.

[+] misk@sopuli.xyz -12 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I won’t argue that I know what was your intention when asking the question but you definitely didn’t phrase it as criteria for you specifically but rather newcomers in general.

[–] AwesomeLowlander@sh.itjust.works 10 points 1 day ago (1 children)

My post started with 'Criteria: I’m looking for instances that are defed’ with the Big 3 tankies', which you conveniently left out of your quote. That direct statement was not clearly phrased enough?

[+] misk@sopuli.xyz -9 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (1 children)

It’s very clearly phrased. I’m saying that if you want a newcomer instance then defederating porn instances is more important than instance that doesn’t really go out of its way to interfere with other communities. Sopuli is actually one of the first instances to block Hexbear outright when other big instance admins hesitated to.

[–] AwesomeLowlander@sh.itjust.works 11 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I want a instance that I'm comfortable recommending to my crowd. I listed the criteria that I needed for my specific group of friends, and porn is not something that is an issue here. Maybe as a secondary criteria, but that's a distant second.

[.ml] doesn’t really go out of its way to interfere with other communities

Yes, but I'm not willing or comfortable recommending anything that's got a bunch of .ml comms on the front page.