this post was submitted on 07 Apr 2025
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It's honestly so many people! How did admitting you are wrong become so painful for so much of society?
It's not society, it's a human thing because we evolved that way. Plenty of discussion on exactly this all over the internet. Too tired to think it out and write a bunch, but I'm a firm believer. Also, note this trait is splattered all over the planet, not just a country or two.
Life experience has born this out. Admitting fault is seen as a weakness. Even though people don't consciously think it, you still get a ding on your "social score". Here's the one exception in my life that proves the rule:
Worked at a place where admitting fault was an highly esteemed action. No one so much as tried to blunt the blame with clever words. Afterwards, no fingers were pointed and we worked together to figure out how to fix the problem and then how to stop it from ever happening again.
Here's the crazy bit, and no one is going to believe it; The was a very small company owned by a staunch conservative, Southern Baptist family. 1 of 4-5 employees were related, but you would never know because they didn't address one another by family connection, only by first name. Best job I ever had, grew my IT knowledge more in 5-years than in the other 20-years put together. And not a soul asked me to go to church or if I even believed. Don't even know where they went.
One of my early jobs as a software developer was in a firm run by some middle-aged Mormons. At the time I had hair down to my ass and my work uniform consisted of black T-shirt, black jeans and black lizard-skin cowboy boots. To say there were cultural differences would be understating it. Also, they had high expectations regarding performance. But they were, in my experience, completely ethical and treated me fairly. I'm not in any way religious but I despise liars and game-players, so I thrived in that firm, and never mind their funny underwear. They did encourage me to buy a suit, which I wore for important customer meetings, but I'd still wear the roach-stompers.
Later, our division of the firm was acquired, and it ended up being managed by a bunch of sleazebag hypertensive corporate weasels. They looted our pension fund. The Saints were forced into early retirement. I was working abroad when all that happened, but when I came back to the US, I quickly left.
This is the same generation that gave us ‘participation trophies’ so their feelings and their kids’ feelings didn’t ‘get hurt’.
I’m not quite sure where this plague of ‘treat my feelings with kid gloves, otherwise I might die’ got started, but we really need to do something about it.