this post was submitted on 13 Aug 2025
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I understand that it is harder to bond to someone who isn't immediately digitally available. I understand that "kids these days! " do their social stuff online, but at the same time, they seem to have largely lost all skill at interacting with real humans of slight or no aquaintence.
It is easy to make sarcastic comments on your phone about how stupid this or that is. The sterotypical basement dweller can snark all day. What takes social skill is actively engaging with people you don't care about and finding common ground.
Yes, digital people track some of this on facebook and such, but in real life: in which community groups do they participate? Do they know what their neighbors do and what they like beyond snapshots of events? That is: yeah, they saw that pic of that cookout, but did they know that he volunteer teaches English as a second language Tuesday and Thursday at the library? When was the last time they went into a neighbor's home (or had one visit theirs) to share a cup of coffee and complain about that road that needs fixing and who to push about it?
Edited to replace 'you' with 'they' so there'd be no confusion that I mean multiple 'you' readers rather than a single person.
I don't think you understand. Would it be nice if society was less dependant on phones for everything social? Sure. It is your kid's responsibility to evangelize to their peers that they have to? Absolutely not.
This isn't a societal question. This is about affording a kid a social life at all. If a kid doesn't have a phone when all their peers have one, there's no "oh well simply only go to events that are shared on something else than phones", because there are no such events. There's no "oh well only socialize with people who will make the effort to only have conversations in person", because there will be at best one kid in the entire school that also doesn't have a phone (hint: they'll be the "weird" kid).
This is equivalent to your parents saying "you may only talk to people at school, you aren't allowed to talk to anyone once you leave school." Surely you understand that this is a surefire way to completely ostracize and socially stunt your kid, and for what benefit? The only thing you gain is that you get to not parent your kid about safe internet use, a thing you really should be doing anyway because they're going to get internet access at some point.
You've got my point backwards. I'm saying kids would be better prepared for life if they talked to people, and particularly if they talked to people they don't particularly care about rather than only swapping phone memes with kids they already know. Also, no one is saying there should be a complete ban on phones. The article simply suggests keeping the bedroom screen-free (better for sleep, studying, etc.). I went further to point out that as we've become more 'social' on phones we're less social in society.
Very cool societal ideas. Please do not have children.