this post was submitted on 25 May 2026
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Two anons demonstrate two sides of the misogyny coin
The first one isn't misogyny. Minus the specifivity of the "$2 million" part, its the Jewish tradition of what is required for a man to be able to propose. "Having kids is too expensive" is just the straight-up truth for anyone who isn't uncommonly comfortable relying on charity and/or society.
Like, are we going off the avatar, pretending a woman who says those things is crazy? Because she's absolutely not, and neither are the men trying to live up to those items, at a minimum.
I don't know how Jewish it is, but it is part of a general trend of how society treats marriage.
Generations back, marriage was considered the beginning, a cornerstone for building an adult life on. Now, it's shifted more towards a capstone, a thing that you can add to your life once you get your shit together. That has shifted expectations in dating, as well as expectations of how independent young adults need to be.
And it has pushed back expectations of what it means to be ready to have children. And once a higher percentage of parents have more money when they have kids, it also subtly shifts the expectations of parenting, as well:
What's wrong with relying on society? Having a good family and social circle is basically the most important part of being ready to have kids. My wife and I waited till we were rich before having kids, but we still heavily rely on our family, friends, and neighbors to enrich our children's lives, while also being there for them and their children: rotating babysitting duties if some parents want to go on a date or even go out of town, rotating dinner hosting so only one family has to cook and clean, getting the kids together so that they can play and socialize, etc. We can't do the parenting thing in isolation, but I don't think society expects us to.
Well, bad news for you there, too: since we're all busy working and commuting and moving states for jobs and our third places are disappearing for various reasons, because our connections have moved globally online instead of locally offline, we are all further away from our families of origin and have smaller social circles to help support our physical lives.