this post was submitted on 11 Apr 2024
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[–] ChaoticNeutralCzech@feddit.de 65 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (5 children)

TL;DR My country's customs officers seem to have misappropriated 7 buttplugs, 8 Venus ball sets, 3 non-USB penis devices and 7 sets of BDSM straps.

We had a large shipment of illegal sex toys seized in the Czech Republic, and the customs office held an auction with publicly disclosed contents of the package. There were several suspicious amounts. I have a copy of the list:

Not auctioned individually, only as a complete set. 1 CZK ≈ 0.04 USD. Yes, we have words for sex toy but they specifically chose more formal wording.

Item Description of the auctioned item Qty Unit price CZK total
1 Erotic aid - anal jewel, 3 pcs/set 594 300 ($13) 178 200,00 ($7722)
2 Erotic aid case 300 210  ($9) 63 000,00 ($2700)
3 Erotic aid (penis) 40 600 ($25) 24 000,00 ($1000)
4 Electric pump 40 90  ($4) 3 600,00  ($160)
5 Sex aid - straps 193 300 ($13) 57 900,00 ($2509)
6 Erotic aid - anal jewel with tail 99 210  ($9) 20 790,00  ($891)
7 Erotic aid for penis without USB 77 300 ($13) 23 100,00 ($1001)
8 Venus balls 112 300 ($13) 33 600,00 ($1456)
9 Enema 210 120  ($5) 25 200,00 ($1050)
10 Enema with black pouch 30 150  ($7) 4 500,00  ($210)
Total price (CZK) 433 890,00 ($18,315)
Auction start at (CZK) 144 630,00  ($6105)

The goods have been legalized for resale in the EU even though some lack CE certification.

Auction notice including photos (Czech, PDF, 9,74 MiB) / Deep-L's English translation of the document (view in browser) - gets interesting on page 5, or just click the hyperlinked items for extracted images (only 6 seems to have been published)

Above is translation of a Reddit comment I had made here but since overwritten with a power-delete tool.

[–] sunbytes@lemmy.world 26 points 7 months ago (2 children)

"erotic aid for penis without usb"

This implies the existence of...

[–] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.world 19 points 7 months ago (2 children)

Well how do YOU charge penises? 🤷

[–] WhiskyTangoFoxtrot@lemmy.world 9 points 7 months ago (1 children)

With a proprietary connector, unfortunately.

[–] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.world 4 points 7 months ago

Your MOM'S a proprietary connector!

She still works for Bumble, right? 😉

[–] MenigPyle@feddit.dk 4 points 7 months ago (1 children)
[–] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.world 4 points 7 months ago

Sure, that works.

[–] ChaoticNeutralCzech@feddit.de 7 points 7 months ago

I am handicapped, my penis does not have a USB port. I am thankful that there are erotic aids made for people like me.

[–] Zagorath@aussie.zone 12 points 7 months ago (2 children)

You can use the "save" function to come later

Yeah you can

[–] ChaoticNeutralCzech@feddit.de 2 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Or I can reply to your comment and have you receive a notification. Yeah, it's done, I even extracted the images from the document (native res, no scaling).

[–] Zagorath@aussie.zone 2 points 7 months ago

Haha thanks!

But unfortunately, tone doesn't carry well through text, and may be especially poorly conveyed to someone who isn't a native speaker (which I'm assuming, from your username). My previous comment was meant to be read with an insinuating tone, playing on your use of the term "come".

[–] HottieAutie@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 points 5 months ago

Let's return together

[–] Zagorath@aussie.zone 12 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (1 children)

I am kinda curious what about these were illegal. Like, are they particularly shoddy home-made stuff? Just some boring lack of import permits? Does Czechia have strict laws around sex toys?

[–] ChaoticNeutralCzech@feddit.de 17 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (1 children)

Nah, likely just incorrectly declared and the importer failed to respond to a tax evasion fine. The Czech Republic is pretty lax when it comes to regulating such things (heck, even this was allowed). They could be legalized without a CE certificate, just some paper work.

[–] HottieAutie@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 points 5 months ago

Based on a few docu-series I've seen on the Internet that include casting interviews, adult parties, and erotic behaviors in public, I'm pretty certain that the Czech Republic is lax on sexual matters.

[–] Appoxo@lemmy.dbzer0.com 6 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (1 children)

60min are over.
We need that information!

For research.

[–] ChaoticNeutralCzech@feddit.de 3 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Sorry, there have been tech problems. It's done, I'll just extract and upload the rest of the images from the PDF.

[–] Appoxo@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 7 months ago

(Disclaimer: My comment earlier was not to be taken seriously)

Thank you for the update :)

[–] Huschke@programming.dev 3 points 7 months ago

Nothing suspicious here lol