this post was submitted on 24 May 2024
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[–] starman2112@sh.itjust.works 19 points 6 months ago (15 children)

The only difference is that I thought I would care as I neared 30, but I really don't. That adolescent pressure to lose your virginity kinda wears off unless you obsess over it

[–] ma1w4re@lemm.ee 12 points 6 months ago (14 children)

Honestly that's the thing I'm afraid of the most. That I will stop wanting sex and just give up.

[–] starman2112@sh.itjust.works 15 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (12 children)

Why is wanting to have sex so important to you? Aside from being a societal norm, there's nothing wrong with not wanting to having sex

[–] DragonTypeWyvern@midwest.social 15 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Because they want to have sex, they just never learned how to get someone to want to have sex with them.

[–] starman2112@sh.itjust.works 4 points 6 months ago (3 children)

Right, but like. Why is wanting to have sex so important?

[–] ma1w4re@lemm.ee 5 points 6 months ago (1 children)

I'm not very sensitive to my feelings, this my entire life I relied on my smarts to figure things out. And now that I think about it bit more indepth, sex itself is not as important to me.

I'm a romantic type, I want to love someone and maybe hopefully be loved too. Now, here's my rambling: the sex part probably comes in a strong desire to have children that I noticed I have, and a want for emotional bonding.

I'm not exactly 100% sure on this self analysis, but judging by a gut feeling when I imagine those things happening, I'd say thats probably the closest thing to reality.

[–] BrundleFly2077@sh.itjust.works 6 points 6 months ago (1 children)

You sound like a reasonable dude. So long as you’re doing stuff for fun that requires other people and being in person, nigh on guaranteed you’ll run into someone who wants to hang out with you and is basically the same.

People wind up sleeping together at some point.

Just mix. Your people are hiding in the same places you are.

[–] ma1w4re@lemm.ee 4 points 6 months ago

Thank you for these words, I really appreciate that.

[–] captainlezbian@lemmy.world 1 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (1 children)

Idk but if it was a felony to get laid I still would. Probably a biological desire or something.

Like, it’s valuable to deconstruct the social aspect of it, but also people had to go to the Supreme Court for the right to get laid in my country so there’s definitely more than just a social aspect.

The issue is that barring external factors you still have to actually get someone to want to fuck you to have sex with them and that’s the hard part for many of these folks. And I get that that sucks

[–] starman2112@sh.itjust.works -1 points 6 months ago (1 children)

I get that. I just think that the idea that not wanting to have sex scares ma1w4re is strange.

[–] captainlezbian@lemmy.world 2 points 6 months ago

That makes sense. I guess I just assumed he meant it as a “some dreams are met with acceptance of the fact that they’ll never happen” way. Like being ok with the fact that you’ll never be famous or learning to stop wanting parental love. Not asexuality, but complacency and acceptance.

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