this post was submitted on 27 Jun 2024
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I think this is a good opportunity to collectively discuss what is causing us to lead this lifestyle.
I had to move to a country with a more introverted culture than the one I grew up in (not the US), and I've struggled finding friends to spend my free time with so far, so I spend it on apps :-( They really are just a last resort and I'd much rather spend my time with actual people like in the olden days :-/
sign up for a class/activity, wear a conversation piece.
Smart move the latter, ~didn't think it.
About the former, I recently realized in practice that it's important to pick up activities etc. that you like and that attract people you can bond with. For example I like weightlefting at gym, but I realized it attracts so many people with repulsive ideologies, while I tried dancing and mobility classes the same gym offers and the environment was much much better, I found many good people there. (I still do weightlifting though and I found some good people there too.)
Plus, voicing your opinions helps a lot to filter people (I'm struggling a lot with this though).
This is massive. "Filtering" is the perfect way to put it. If you don't risk saying something potentially disagreeable, then no one will ever know who you are.
That goes for both repulsive and inclusive ideologies, I guess, but I definitely prefer the latter (this is an example of one of your "filtering" statements - now spectators to this conversation know I value inclusivity).