Not The Onion

12358 readers

244 users here now

Welcome

We're not The Onion! Not affiliated with them in any way! Not operated by them in any way! All the news here is real!

The Rules

Posts must be:

Links to news stories from...
...credible sources, with...
...their original headlines, that...
...would make people who see the headline think, “That has got to be a story from The Onion, America’s Finest News Source.”

Comments must abide by the server rules for Lemmy.world and generally abstain from trollish, bigoted, or otherwise disruptive behavior that makes this community less fun for everyone.

And that’s basically it!

founded 1 year ago

MODERATORS

kescusay@lemmy.world

Could monkeys predict the U.S. election? (www.science.org)

submitted 2 months ago by LynneOfFlowers@midwest.social to c/nottheonion@lemmy.world

13 comments fedilink hide all child comments

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments

[–] Nougat@fedia.io 31 points 2 months ago (1 children)

“We assume monkeys were unaware of the identity, party affiliation, or policies of any of the candidates,” they wrote.

I fucking love this.

[–] OpenStars@discuss.online 5 points 2 months ago

Some bold assumptions, if you ask me!

I give the best bananas, people say, nobody in the whole world gives better bananas than me 🍌, and when I give a banana, some assume, I don't just give a banana, but see they're coming, their (sic) rapists, and they're not sending their best people, but when i flush the toilet it doesn't work quite right and that's why folks, that's why when I give this monkey the best banana in the world, that's why people don't think it be like that but it do.