this post was submitted on 21 Oct 2024
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Not The Onion
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I feel like we all knew this was not the onion. The onion would be a Russian oligarch dying in any different manner.
Russian oligarch survives assassination attempt by leaping out window
This is the onion article.
Russian oligarch dies peacefully in his sleep of old age.
Mikhail Roguchev died peacefully in his sleep last Thursday evening surrounded by his family and the heavy iron chains he had fashioned to keep him from being thrown through a window...
Russian window manufacturer issues recall after hundreds of fatalities.
Window killed by russian oligarch
Russian Oligarch missing after falling up out of window.
Russian oligarch dead from falling window, officials on scene say "huh, well that usually happens the other way round doesn't it?".
or falling out after installing a new set of windows