this post was submitted on 13 Apr 2025
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Greentext

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This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

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[–] doingthestuff@lemy.lol 7 points 6 days ago

Some women have never been told no. It can be more fun than saying yes sometimes though.

[–] latenightnoir@lemmy.blahaj.zone 158 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

I don't care if this makes me a bad person, I get such immense satisfaction from this kind of emotional blowout. It's so fulfilling to see bona fide narcissists fail then go hysterical about it❤️

[–] southsamurai@sh.itjust.works 107 points 1 week ago (3 children)

I mean, obviously fictitious and elatedly happy

That being said, there really are people like that. I've been in that situation, and I've seen it happen plenty. Maybe not those exact words, but sometimes , yes "I could have you if I wanted"

There really are people that are both so arrogant as to believe they're that "good", and so narcissistic that whether or not you're interested doesn't matter.

Like, I'm not some kind of super studly dude. I'm big, and strong, but I'm also hairy, balding, have always had at least a little belly on me, wear glasses, and have a round face, so I don't have those chiseled features that folks get wet over. But I do pretty damn good. My kind of look has a degree of popularity, and the mind inside the body makes it work. So this isn't some kind of situation where everything is chasing me.

That being said, it is really annoying how often some shitty excuse for a human being has assumed that I would just jump in the sack with them, much less anything more. And it isn't even the stereotypical "hot babes" either. Just women that assume that because they have a pussy, a guy is going to fall into the damn thing. You kinda expect narcissism when someone is on the prowl, looking for hookups and arm candy. But when you're at a casual dinner party, and they're coming at you with that kind of thinking, it's extra extra. I mean, it isn't always women, but the women tend to be more insistent, and more about demeaning you than men are.

When it's guys, you make it clear you're hetero, and it's "oh, well then" and it almost always ends there, or with a simple "if you tried this, that might change", and then they're done.

But the women that think that way? It's like they pin their whole sense of self on the idea that they can have any guy, no matter what. And, if you aren't the classically handsome dude, you're insulting them by just refusing to agree that if they wanted you, they could. Like, motherfucker, you're insulting me just by saying that you don't want me, and you're adding in the assumption that my dick is in control of me? GTFO.

You know what's funny though? Only ever had one stripper try that shit. Bounced gay bars and titty bars off and on for years. You'd think strippers would be more prone to that kind of thing than other professions. Not for me. I would get the whole "it's a shame you're such a good guy, I'd ruin you" here and there, bit that's a whole different thing entirely.

Ran into it most with nurses, but I worked in that field more than as a bouncer, so they're disproportionately represented in the people I would have extended interactions with.

I eventually learned to just say okay and walk away. That kind of thinking, there's no point in arguing, and you can't change the subject, so you just leave.

[–] loaExMachina@sh.itjust.works 61 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (3 children)

I knew a woman who was absolutely certain she could have any guy easily. it's true she was most attractive, but also super toxic, like she really had a history of driving her partners insane. Then she took interest in a rich boy who'd recently made some successful investment in timber trade. The dude in question was no stranger to toxicity either, he'd been quite the fuckboy. One guy almost beat him up over this once and everyone cheered, but they ended up becoming friends, and his new bestie really had a good influence on him, he'd become a pretty decent guy. Anyway, the toxic lady made advances on the ex-fuckboy and he said "No, don't take it personally, I'd rather not be turned into a donkey or whatever it is you do to your boyfriends, thanks you."

But she did take it personally. Her old father owned quite the estate, including a very big, strong and aggressive bull. She unleashed it on the town to destroy the homes and devour the crops. The bull was also toxic, so no food would grow in its wake for seven years or something. But ex-fuckboi and his niceboi bff were very strong, so they killed the bull, and brought its carcass to toxic lady, as a sassy offering, which she didn't appreciate.

[–] intentionallyBlue@lemmy.world 56 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Unexpected Gilgamesh. Well done!

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[–] bladerunnerspider@lemmy.world 27 points 1 week ago (2 children)
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[–] 5714@lemmy.dbzer0.com 84 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

The core concept of the problem is not related to gender, it's just that in societies highly differentiated by gender people have different means.

Talk to male friend

He randomly says if he wanted me he could have me

I tell him no he couldn't

He gets really mad and says he could easily have me if he wanted to, practically has a fit of rage

Changed pronouns exemplifies that that the core concept of this is that "having someone" is supposedly less about consent and more about compliance to standardised appearance (aka so-called "objective" beauty). If you have a lot of means (e.g. male or wealth privilege), this gets creepy real fast.

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[–] loaExMachina@sh.itjust.works 70 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Should've said "prove it then".

[–] NostraDavid@programming.dev 11 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

????
Girlfriend

[–] Geetnerd@lemmy.world 69 points 1 week ago (1 children)

What happened?

A 4channer made up a story for attention.

[–] Shortstack@reddthat.com 50 points 1 week ago (1 children)

So... in other words, fake and gay

[–] Geetnerd@lemmy.world 30 points 1 week ago (2 children)

How dare you.

Gay people don't make up stories on the internet for attention.

[–] whostosay@lemmy.world 28 points 1 week ago (3 children)
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[–] Skanky@lemmy.world 63 points 1 week ago (3 children)

The correct reply is...

"There's really only one way you could have me, and that is [describe whatever sort of sexual kink you're into]. After that, I might consider it."

[–] sugar_in_your_tea@sh.itjust.works 26 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Be prepared with pictures to make sure your communication is clear.

[–] Comment105@lemm.ee 19 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Make a WikiHow, don't let her know you wrote it, make it weirdly specific but in a plausibly deniable way.

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[–] rainrain@sh.itjust.works 11 points 1 week ago

A truly discerning woman would blumpy me while having my dog.

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[–] LeninsOvaries@lemmy.cafe 61 points 1 week ago (11 children)

Bro this is basically an invitation for you to say "prove it"

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[–] warmaster@lemmy.world 59 points 1 week ago

"That's ~~my~~ no secret. Anyone could have me"

[–] Xerxos@lemmy.ml 36 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (2 children)

Well, the female friend basically said 'I am so hot anyone I want (for example you) would love to have me as a girlfriend'.

By denying that, he denied her self worth.

Of course, her stance doesn't take into account things like personal preference or matching personalities.

[–] Buddahriffic@lemmy.world 16 points 1 week ago

Or how unattractive that mindset itself is. It's like the opposite of a self-fulfilling prophecy.

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[–] Justas@sh.itjust.works 35 points 1 week ago

"The odds are good, but the goods are odd."

[–] rekabis@lemmy.ca 35 points 1 week ago (13 children)

IME the vast majority of women have no clue how to react to being rejected, because it almost never happens to them. As such, nearly all react badly or maladaptively regardless of conditions.

Conversely, for most men they have to endure rejection hundreds if not thousands of times before they strike it lucky. The small cohort that become maladaptive do so due to other social/societal reasons associated with the rejection, but vanishingly few react maladaptively purely because of the rejection.

[–] ameancow@lemmy.world 24 points 1 week ago

Tell that to the surprisingly large number of men who threaten fucking violence against a girl for not wanting to go out with them.

I'm not saying you're entirely wrong, but it's not the only side of the story. Generally all people are really bad at handling emotions with other people, we need to make a stronger effort to turn these criticisms inward and figure out if our fears of other people are justified.

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[–] Thcdenton@lemmy.world 27 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] SomeAmateur@sh.itjust.works 15 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] Glytch@lemmy.world 12 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] don@lemm.ee 10 points 1 week ago
[–] OmegaLemmy@discuss.online 22 points 1 week ago (2 children)

I'm sure everyone has their own answer to this question but I would really like her to clarify, what do you mean 'have me'?

[–] SaharaMaleikuhm@feddit.org 14 points 1 week ago

Please let it be pegging

[–] ameancow@lemmy.world 12 points 1 week ago

I think the better clarification we need to make is that this is 4chan and thus utterly made-up bullshit, or designed to further an agenda.

[–] Amir@lemmy.ml 19 points 1 week ago

So many comments giving OP advice on how to get into a relationship with the girl. Has a single person here, at all, considered that maybe, just maybe, OP genuinely didn't want a relationship with this girl..?

I also think deflecting with "nah you couldn't" would be funny in the right context. Follow it with a joke about increasing her powerlevel first and you're good

[–] PhilipTheBucket@ponder.cat 11 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] KingJalopy@lemm.ee 66 points 1 week ago (23 children)

Anon is very smart and too good for this person

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[–] selokichtli@lemmy.ml 11 points 1 week ago

Hahaha. Just another case of being gay unbeknownst to OP.

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