humanoid robot: dances
amazon: shock
humanoid robot: makes coffee
amazon: shock
humanoid robot: delivers package
amazon: friendly shock
this post was submitted on 06 Jun 2025
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Companies like Amazon would do anything. Except paying living wages
Remember that hitch hiking robot that made it across Canada but only made it to New Jersey (started in NYC) in America? These will 100% get the same treatment everywhere on earth.
Not only Canada, but also Japan and Europe.
The main difference is that these robots kind of deserve it. Not "personally" but for what they represent.
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If i see a humanoid robot delivering a package i will throw bricks at it and then pee on it, in the way a 3 year old would during a tantrum.
I, for one, will certainly not loot it for parts, unless it has an unfortunate accident, in which case I'm just recycling trash that someone left out.
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The head was never found
They'll be vandalised almost immediately.
Non-consentually arbitraged
Not in Philly they won't lol
Amazon still can't even figure out how to reliably get human drivers door passcodes into an apartment building, and then into its mail/package locker room.
The map system it uses for telling drivers how to get around a city to make deliveries is also garbage, can't account for traffic, punishes people for using faster side routes to get to the same place, tells you to park in areas that either have no parking at all, or where parking there would majorly disrupt traffic, or assumes available street parking will always exist in places and times it almost never does.
I once did an Amazon delivery gig where they booked me in for the time slot, I get to the FC, after waiting an hour they tell half of us: 'oops we booked too many drivers, so today you all get $200 for showing up and doing nothing, go home now'
???
Update: It is day 126 and Amazon still can't figure out where my camera is.
I know where it is. Their delivery driver stole it. (Yes, I just charged back my credit card. Their response was to send me an incredibly smarmy and condescending form email asking why, as if they don't already know. And they lost the chargeback dispute, obviously.)
So maybe their robots won't steal your package. They'll just yeet it into a bush 65536 yards from your house in a random direction instead. On the bright side, you might occasionally get a package that belongs to someone else from the other side of town dropped on your lawn.
To both this and that I say no thanks; I don't use Amazon anymore.
Amazon sent my next door neighbour a photograph of my back garden indicating they delivered the package. In the photo you can see my door with the obviously wrong house number.
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The robot then encounters the entirely unpredictable American rural south
staircases half busted up surrounded by weeds and gravel roads full of holes
robots fucked with by kids who are now tying it to a tree with bungie cords for fun
one being dragged off in the background by a dude with a welding mask on
wageslave.exe has encountered an internal exception and must close
Wonder how much copper is wired up in those things
I'm pretty sure it will be a valuable amount of copper.
Edit: Except of course I guess it won't, because they're just bullshitting to drum up invetor interest, and only three of these will ever exist.
Ea-nasir strikes again!
what? they gave up on the drones?
I guess they felt like drones flying over civilian populations was a bit too unsettling in this day and age, so they are shifting to humanoids that will jump suddenly from moving vehicles and dash towards a destination.
Amazons “genius” packing bots will throw a tiny fragile thing with a medium size heavy thing in a box 16x too big along with a shred of packing material.
Can’t wait to have that same “genius” applied to the actual delivery itself.
Seriously, I make maybe 5 or 6 Amazon purchases per year. I would say at least 50% of those disappoint in some way: the item was misleadingly listed, or it was damaged in shipping, or it doesn’t arrive when the promised. I really don’t find it convenient at all.
Amazon 1 year after launch: Unfortunately, the space needed for robots in the van means that the van has to return to base 5 times more often to reload with the actual packages and the extra weight of robots more than doubles the weight of the van being lugged around in the form of heavy robots. So that's why we are having to charge more for delivery and why it is taking longer for you to get your packages. But at least we can pay fewer salaries.
Also we don’t pay taxes but will fuck up the roads with the extra weight. Good luck driving over potholes suckers!
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They already treat their workers like humanoid robots, so this tracks.
I'd be terrified if that thing showed up at my door.
I'd be very glad and a bit richer
Be funny if hackers hacked them to kill CEOs.
I just stop buying from Amazon
They can depreciate these assets over their useful life, because unlike your soggy flesh sack, these are capital expenses, not operating expenses.
... For now. I'm sure there are libertarians that think you should be able to sell yourself as the depreciable asset you are.