Memes

Married at 23. Met my husband at 18 on a dating app, was supposed to be a quickie. He's just that charming, and I love him lol.

I was just a kid... why would you think I'd know better?

Marurity matters, not years . In my parents era 18 was a common marriage age, but they were done high-school and working full time at 16, unless you went to Uni.

I'm 35 and I'm still not sure that I'm old enough to get married yet.

I also think that when I see people of that age married or with kids. But I think it's just because of our different life experiences.

I opted to enroll in a PhD right after graduating and so, at 30, I still feel like my life isn't at a point when I can start thinking about kids or marriage. But I know a lot of people enter relatively stable jobs as soon as they graduate university (or high school, although in my circles everyone went to university - it's not as expensive as in the US here). I can understand people in that position starting to think about family earlier than me.

I was recently trying to talk a person online out of marrying someone once the two of them are both 18. It's partly because they're head-over-heels in love with their partner and partly to move out of the US to Canada to escape their trans hostile state. They are trans and their partner helped them through some rough patches. The couple is only now meeting in person for the first time after three years. It was a little frustrating talking to them because I'm a naturally cautious person. My husband and I took about five years from first date to cohabiting to wedding. They honestly sounded like your stereotypical love sick teenager.

I would agree with the general judgement of this cartoon. There's going to be some survivor bias for marriages that worked young. I know a woman who married a man who was in his 50's when she was 18, right out of high school. When he died, she never remarried. But you never hear much about the marriages where an 18-year-old deemed themselves "more mature than those other girls/boys" and it turned into a disaster. They typically don't last that long and no one wants to talk about them much.

No one knows what they want for the rest of their lives when they're 34 anymore than 24. Same for 44, 54, etc. we're all figuring this shit out together.

But I'll pose another hot take:

Marriage is stupid in general. Pledging to commit your life to another person is stupid, and you don't need a church or government to recognize your commitment. If you end up hating each other somewhere down the road (which is likely) there's no sense in continuing to torture each other. It's not good for anyone. Get divorced? Well then what was the point of getting married in the first place? It's supposed to be a lifelong commitment.

@Custoslibera@lemmy.world Could you share the meme template, please? =)

This sub is for memes not for changing your mind get therapy if you need changing your mind.

I'm 40ish and I've wanted the same thing since I was 20. Haven't found a good match but nothing has really changed regarding my long term goals and the things I want from life.