this post was submitted on 29 Jan 2024
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>be me, 8 years old
>it's Christmas Eve and I'm excited and preparing to stay up late to see Santa Claus
>sometime around midnight, I hear jingle bells and rush out of bed to get a glimpse of Santa
>while Santa is placing my gifts by the tree, the window next to him shatters as a dark figure rushes into the house with a sledge hammer and slams it into Santa's head
>he literally caves Santa's head in so hard his eyeball pops out.
>hearing all the commotion, my dad rushes down from his bedroom, grabs a knife and starts wrestling the man
>during the scuffle my dad somehow disembowels the guy and I watch as my dad finally puts him down while his intestines fall out
>a few days later my dad sits me down and tells me that the attacker was some local meth head who went on a drug induced rampage and that "Santa" was really my grandpa who had visited us earlier in the day
>mfw I find out Santa Claus isn't real

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[–] PhlubbaDubba@lemm.ee 65 points 10 months ago (1 children)

I honestly feel worse for the grandpa here!

[–] Maeve@kbin.social 41 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Ok, but I argue the kid was more traumatized,

[–] Gullible@sh.itjust.works 65 points 9 months ago (2 children)

Absolutely. He’s going to have to live with knowing that Santa isn’t real.

[–] Anamana@feddit.de 2 points 9 months ago
[–] Maeve@kbin.social 1 points 9 months ago
[–] Deceptichum@kbin.social 28 points 10 months ago

That happened.

[–] morphballganon@lemmy.world 12 points 10 months ago

It's a Christmas miracle

[–] pinkdrunkenelephants@lemmy.cafe 2 points 9 months ago (1 children)

So, who was the Santa that was murdered by the methhead?

[–] Gullible@sh.itjust.works 2 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Anon’s grandfather. It’s okay, anon still got their presents.

[–] pinkdrunkenelephants@lemmy.cafe 1 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago)

But it says the grandfather was there earlier so how could he possibly be the Santa Claus?