Grifters have to make up the losses from Trump somehow.
this post was submitted on 28 Oct 2025
761 points (98.5% liked)
Not The Onion
18491 readers
2984 users here now
Welcome
We're not The Onion! Not affiliated with them in any way! Not operated by them in any way! All the news here is real!
The Rules
Posts must be:
- Links to news stories from...
- ...credible sources, with...
- ...their original headlines, that...
- ...would make people who see the headline think, “That has got to be a story from The Onion, America’s Finest News Source.”
Please also avoid duplicates.
Comments and post content must abide by the server rules for Lemmy.world and generally abstain from trollish, bigoted, or otherwise disruptive behavior that makes this community less fun for everyone.
And that’s basically it!
founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
I hear that MAGA hats have chemicals that leach into your brain and make you a complete idiot.
Eh, massive correlation is still not causation. No matter how massive.
For instance, the correlation between Tylenol and autism.
Because there is a correlation. Tylenol is shown to be the most effective tool for combating fevers during pregnancy. And as it happens a high fever during pregnancy is also correlated with an increased incidence of autism. And since that was true prior to Tylenol existing, I'm sure if either of them has anything to do with it, it's the fever.
if the whole Tylenol thing causes pregnant women to suffer through more fever and that causes more autism… well, laugh is the wrong adjective but the irony would be in abundance
load more comments
(2 replies)
load more comments
(4 replies)
If there is a civil war, I suspect that Tylenol would be on the side of the Allies & Union. Texans and MAGA will have to use homeopathic remedies to (not) ease their pain.
Oh man crunchy tarot card constellations witches are going to be so confused which side to join.
load more comments
(3 replies)
load more comments
(5 replies)
I hope they bankrupt the fucking state of Texas. Someone should sue him for wasting taxpayer money. Toss-up on whether I feel bad enough for progressive &/or sensible Texans to care how those two thoughts play-out.
load more comments
(3 replies)
Worst of all is that this probably will end in a settlement where the US government gets to claim they were right in exchange for just a "small" donation to the US government
That's what colleges and networks were doing for a while, but since Kimmel stood up to them and won BIG, potential victims have been pushing back. Colleges are refusing money with strings, for one thing.
If J&J is smart (and it's not clear that they are, although they are well-established to be evil), they'll refuse to settle.
OK! Good! FINALLY! Now that they're pulling this shit, big companies have reason to fight back. I was wondering when Proctor and Gamble and Johnson and Johnson would start campaigning to get these psychos out of office, and this should do it.
load more comments
(8 replies)
It turns out someone really was after his lucky charms!
Texas based leprechaun association sues all Texan kids for lucky charm thefts going back to the 70's!
This is upsetting to me.
I’m barely grasping my spot on the AuADHD space, and now it’s been politicized into a single dimensional disease Republicans are using to virtue signal, like the whole vaccine “debate.”
And I’m in freaking Texas. It’s not as Republican as y’all think, especially in the big metros, but somehow we got Paxton in.
And apparently you guys forgot about previous frivolous lawsuits. Huge media conglomerates, and other institutions, settled with the Trump DoJ because they saw them for what they are: a shake down. “Pay us, or you will find political trouble.”
That’s what’s happening.
The merits do not matter. There is no “fight” here.
J&J is going to settle with Texas and maybe others so MAGA doesn’t persecute them outside the lawsuit.
load more comments
(5 replies)
Johnson & Johnson should just say "Our bad. We'll stop selling all our products in your state!"
Then sit back & watch the fallout
this is funny as fuck. what's next, allergy medicine causing ADHD?
Shhhh, don't tell them. It will ruin our plan of infecting all kids with neurodivergence to increase Linux marketshare...
load more comments
(7 replies)
So glad I left that shithole state. Tired of Ken "Securities Fraud" Paxton wasting my tax dollars on frivolous bullshit like this.