You could save a LOT of money by replacing the execs with AI.
this post was submitted on 12 Mar 2026
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You can save even more money by shutting down Atlassian and all its trash products
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Their products are utter garbage to begin with, this can only hasten their well-deserved demise.
"Uh, we need you to clear out your desk ASAP."
"Sure, just submit a JIRA ticket and I'll get right on it."
It's even worse than that: it'll be a ServiceNow ticket.
JIRA and Bitbucket are so bad that even Microsoft Azure DevOps (that is a reskin of the decade old Visual Studio Online, which itself is a reskin on the two decade old Microsoft TFS) is somehow better than it. And everyone loves to hate on Microsoft products.
Are there any actually good enterprise grade Task tracker + Code repo combo that we should be suggesting the execs migrate to? Maybe the GitHub Enterprise product?
My org just rolled our own project management tool that matches our workflow now.
I’m amazed they had 1600 employees to begin with. I guess it takes a lot of resources to make something suck as hard as JIRA
3 coders and 1597 managers.
Who else is going to put the sidebar as top bar, and then switch them back a couple years later?
They renamed "project" to "space", so that it's harder to find what you are looking for.
They renamed "ticket" to "work item" to "issue". (We all still call it a ticket)
Stories? Events? Kanban?
Fuck you, I need a text box, date field and some box to tick that says I'm done.
All this so that some VP with their thumb up their ass who spends 2/3 of the year in Florida knows I'm working!
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That sucks, but how the fuck does Atlassian have 16,000 workers to begin with? What do they all do? And their products look like... Guestures at all of them
They are the ones in charge of making sure bitbucket stops working every other Thursday.
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It’s not because of their garbage AI. It’s because their garbage AI is leading to people dropping them like a bad habit for open source and fucking Microsoft alternatives, so they need to reduce operating costs and CAPEX to demonstrate profit growth
"AI is too dumb to take our jobs" as if that matters. that's not even the point, the point of Generative AI is to mine data and devalue human labour. according to the like 120 people who run this world too many people are making too much money so now we have a dogshit "technology" made to cut your wages whenever it's convenient.
Atlassian is getting thrashed in the stockmarket and they're using AI as a get out of jail free card to conduct massive layoffs.
Its too bad that in the end they are just making forgettable tools that jira aside already have extensive competition, that actually feel built for enterprise vs the garbage atlassian is making.
If it wasn't for the army of agile cultists who claim that work is impossible without Jira they'd probably already be a much smaller company.
We have https://codeberg.org/ as an alternative to Bitbucket, and you can have free public static pages like Netlify or Github pages.
Codeberg also offers private repos.
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Yet everyone helps feed this AI beast. No one thinks... Maybe I'm helping this through my data.
this post helps to feed the AI beast
there’s no escaping it; let’s not do with AI what we’ve done with CO2 and plastic and shift blame to individuals
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TBH Atlassian was already such terrible slop, unsupervised AI might even make it better
I don't think AI needs collaboration and project management software. Good luck with that future.
Best time to create AI free alternatives for those products.
It was always a good time to create alternatives to Atlassian products.
Quite disappointed in him. Always thought he was a reasonable character but using e-mail is such a slap in the face.
Oh boy, guess we can look forward to more vibe-coded slop which will make it an even bigger pain to use.
Good, WWIII needs some meat puppets.
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