this post was submitted on 02 Jan 2025
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Greentext

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This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

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[–] SmackemWittadic@lemmy.world 13 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

Oh you'd hate to know about how when you shit sitting down you get Poseidon's kiss.

That's why I shit standing up like a real man

[–] brotundspiele@sh.itjust.works 7 points 1 week ago (1 children)

While standing, do you shit directly into the water so that all the women in your vicinity get aroused by the sound of the splash or are you a stealth shitting fuckboy like Anon? And how exactly do you aim? So many questions.

[–] SmackemWittadic@lemmy.world 4 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

You face towards the toilet, stand right on the toilet seat, and aim the shit directly into the water.

That gives you highest drop distance for maximum splash sound and maximum bitches.