this post was submitted on 15 Aug 2025
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Because men don't have a strong enough social support system to have cathartic talks about their emotions. Because women aren't willing to disproportionately shoulder emotional labor anymore.
The patriarchy hurts everyone. Normalize discussing mental health among men. Don't let stigma stop you from telling your friends from how much they mean to you and how you're here if they need to talk.
The latest Modern Love episode is relevant
Where Did All My Male Friendships Go? https://www.nytimes.com/2025/08/13/podcasts/male-friendships-loneliness.html
It doesn't overanalyze but covers one man's experience that I found relatable
Why is there always an assumption that women have support? Also, you really shouldn’t trauma dump on your friends either - they won’t be able to give you space and it may affect them emotionally. Go to a support group and share there.
My (presumably) man, get better friends. If I can make a friend of mine feel better by listening to him, why wouldn't I? I may not know what to say, but I would try my best. The saddest (on an inter-personal level, not as in "the world is going to shit") thing I experienced recently was a friend of mine basically disappearing because of mental health issues. I think I understand why he did that, comparing yourself to others sucks, but I wish I could help him more than the occasional "hey, how are you doing?" when we randomly meet somewhere.
There wasn't. I never said every woman always has support. I only said that men struggle with vocalizing mental health needs among their friends.
If talking to your friends about trauma at the appropriate stage in your friendship is considered trauma dumping, I'm sorry to say that I'm afraid you don't have close friends.
That, or you're coddling and patronizing your friends for lacking the emotional maturity to handle deeper conversations.
True friendship comes from being comfortable with your vulnerabilities around your friends, and having each other's backs. A support group isn't a substitute because it's premise is transactional in nature, where you are expected to talk about and listen to trauma without attachment.
Fully recognizing that my initial reaction to the word "stigma" makes me part of the problem.
stigma love and compassion into this relationship lmao gottem