Greentext

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This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

Anon is often crazy.
Anon is often depressed.
Anon frequently shares thoughts that are immature, offensive, or incomprehensible.

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

founded 2 years ago

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Early_To_Risa@sh.itjust.works

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Anon is a comedian (sh.itjust.works)

submitted 1 week ago by Early_To_Risa@sh.itjust.works to c/greentext@sh.itjust.works

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[–] damnedfurry@lemmy.world 27 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Some of my favorites:

I came from a real tough neighborhood. Why, every time I shut the window I hurt somebody's fingers.

I'm not a hypochondriac, but my gynecologist firmly believes I am.

My mother, she never breastfed me. She told me she liked me as a friend.

Nothing goes right. I joined Gamblers Anonymous. They gave me two-to-one I don’t make it.

[–] dditty@lemmy.dbzer0.com 14 points 1 week ago

The other day my wife greeted me at the door in a sexy negligee; the only problem is, she was just getting home!