Selfhosted
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Right,:
Though btw speaking of:
Plenty of people have been drone striked (struck?) simply because the metadata said they were talking to the wrong guy. Frankly if you need that high of a level of secrecy, you'd be better served using tails/tor, or hell even snail mail with false return addr and a book cipher. But for:
Then frankly either signal or jabber+encryption (or for that matter, simplex, briar, yadda yadda) should be fine.
But then again, it's more likely to be known as an encrypted chat which may be a problem for them, while the abusive SO might just think XMPP is some outdated IM they know what signal is, and "my friends" can use jabber just the same as signal.
Except not. XMPP not being tied to a phone number, if my buddy Steve deletes Conversations, while I may not be able to message him on jabber I can fall back on text. However (and again maybe now this is fixed), on signal if he deletes the app, I can no longer signal message him, nor can I SMS him because they get lost in limbo as signal messages, I'd have to email or use XMPP to get him to redownload signal, delete it properly, and THEN I can SMS him again. (Maybe no longer now that "no sms," but also "no sms now but still give us your phone number" don't sit right with me.)