this post was submitted on 04 Jun 2026
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Selfhosted

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A place to share alternatives to popular online services that can be self-hosted without giving up privacy or locking you into a service you don't control.

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Please don't expect the community to give you answers to your questions which you then delete right afterwards. Those of us who put time into answering your questions are not doing so just to serve your personal needs, we are here to help build a community knowledge base that others can search and reference.

This has become a chronic issue with Lemmy and its starting to feel like it's a waste of time to answer questions.

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[–] LovableSidekick@lemmy.world 13 points 8 hours ago* (last edited 8 hours ago) (2 children)

I think a good solution would be to create a community specifically to connect people who don't want to share their posts and people willing to provide individual help. They could find each other and DM a conversation. Milking a public forum for advice and then vandalizing it by deleting the post is definitely NOT a good solution, and I do not share your sympathy for people who do that. It's like curtaining off a few back rows of a bus to use all day as an office - although that could have been funny in a Seinfeld episode.

[–] frongt@lemmy.zip 2 points 8 hours ago (1 children)

That would be any freelancing hiring platform.

[–] LovableSidekick@lemmy.world 2 points 8 hours ago* (last edited 8 hours ago) (1 children)

I spent many years as a software dev contractor working through agencies, but I still don't see the parallel.

[–] frongt@lemmy.zip 4 points 8 hours ago (1 children)

I mean if you want personal, private, ad-hoc support, hire someone to work for you personally.

[–] LovableSidekick@lemmy.world 1 points 7 hours ago (1 children)

And yet free opensource software exists. Lots of knowledgeable people are happy to help others during their free time.

[–] trackball_fetish@lemmy.wtf 3 points 7 hours ago

It's me, I'm people

There are good reasons for hiding a paper trail. Specifically in a self-hosting community, I understand operators wanting to hide their particular technical details from those who would wish to target them. This can be government agencies who like to arrest or kill dissidents, or freelance assholes who just like to attack queer infra where they can. I don't think deleting posts is particularly effective, and the privacy concerns would be better addressed with a safe alt or a burner account, but I get why some people do it. Privacy is hard and when the stakes are high, people tend to over-secure rather than risk under-securing.