this post was submitted on 02 Jun 2026
61 points (96.9% liked)

Not The Onion

21657 readers
787 users here now

Welcome

We're not The Onion! Not affiliated with them in any way! Not operated by them in any way! All the news here is real!

The Rules

Posts must be:

  1. Links to news stories from...
  2. ...credible sources, with...
  3. ...their original headlines, that...
  4. ...would make people who see the headline think, “That has got to be a story from The Onion, America’s Finest News Source.”

Please also avoid duplicates.

Comments and post content must abide by the server rules for Lemmy.world and generally abstain from trollish, bigoted, ableist, or otherwise disruptive behavior that makes this community less fun for everyone.

And that’s basically it!

founded 3 years ago
MODERATORS
 

President Donald Trump made a striking claim during a recent White House press event, telling those gathered that an unnamed new drug has the ability to bring patients back from death’s door.

“We know the drug works,” Trump, 79, said during the press conference at the White House on Monday, May 11, per a clip shared on X. “We’ve taken people that were dead. We had a person given the last rites — gone, the kids are crying and everything — and started them on this drug. And the person became better. It works.”

top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] Fedegenerate@fedinsfw.app 1 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

Test it on yourself Donald, on camera, for all to see.

[–] LMurch@thelemmy.club 1 points 1 day ago

He always tells on himself. So they are keeping him going with a drug cocktail. We assumed as much.

[–] Avicenna@programming.dev 12 points 3 days ago

next he is gonna say they had chatgpt discover it.

seriously though he is probably using a very loose definition of death like "heart stopped 1ms ago" under which umbrella we already have shots like adrenaline.

[–] Rooster326@programming.dev 11 points 3 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

He watched Pulp Fiction. That's it.

That's the whole story.

[–] echodot@feddit.uk 3 points 2 days ago

I was sort of wondering if maybe he was saying it with hyperbole. Like the drug is very effective and people who you thought weren't going to recover from a terrible condition do with this drug. But no, he's literally saying that they're dead and have been dead for a while by the sounds of it and then someone injects the corpse with this and then they're alive again.

I'm gonna go ahead and say that that is the most transparent lie he's come up with so far, and he's had some doozies. I also think we should test it on him.

You now what I don't believe you Krasnov. Prove it yourself.

[–] Corkyskog@sh.itjust.works 6 points 3 days ago (1 children)
[–] echodot@feddit.uk 1 points 2 days ago

Oh, so that's what that picture was about. He really was a doctor.

[–] phoenixz@lemmy.ca 14 points 4 days ago (1 children)

The remarks appeared to be connected to the Right to Try Act, legislation Trump signed during his first administration that allows terminally ill patients to pursue experimental treatments not yet fully approved.

There ya go, just another scam in the end

[–] Lupus108@sh.itjust.works 2 points 3 days ago

There ya go, just another scam in the end

All in all it's just another scam in the end

[–] D_C@sh.itjust.works 22 points 4 days ago (2 children)

How? How the fuck can anyone listen to this cunt and think "yep, this is the guy who should be president!"
JESUS FUCKING CHRIST

[–] Diplomjodler3@lemmy.world 14 points 4 days ago

He made them proud to be racist again. For that they'll follow him all the way to hell.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] Tollana1234567@lemmy.today 6 points 3 days ago

he means the ones hes taking now, cocaine and adderall.

[–] 1984@lemmy.today 6 points 3 days ago (1 children)

We are so blessed to be living in a time where the president of the United States says these things. Lmfo. :)

[–] teyrnon@sh.itjust.works 5 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Our president is a snake oil salesman. Not even a new thing for him either. This is definitely part of some money making scheme just like his quinine bullshit.

[–] echodot@feddit.uk 2 points 2 days ago

I assume it's related to his magic beds.

[–] EndlessNightmare@reddthat.com 1 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

We shall call it: Reanimator

[–] dan1101@lemmy.world 11 points 4 days ago (1 children)

After all that has happened I would only be slightly surprised if the Trump regime starts a zombie apocalypse.

[–] Bongles@lemmy.zip 7 points 4 days ago

At least i wouldn't have to go back to work.
👉🤓👉

[–] NotASharkInAManSuit@lemmy.world 5 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Please let this be the beginning of the zombie apocalypse.

[–] brax@sh.itjust.works 1 points 3 days ago

This started at least 10 years ago when they voted in Trump the first time.

[–] oyzmo@lemmy.world 7 points 4 days ago

someone has asked chatgpt "can this drug bring people back to life?" 😂

[–] 9point6@lemmy.world 9 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago) (2 children)

This is 100% because scientists from Cuba (and Argentina) have just revealed a potential cure for some kinds of lung cancer

[–] AllNewTypeFace@leminal.space 6 points 4 days ago

Didn’t he say this a few weeks ago? Presumably opening the UFO files didn’t distract from the Epstein files enough, so he’s switching from aliens to zombies

[–] DougPiranha42@lemmy.world 2 points 4 days ago (1 children)

I don’t know if any of this stupid discussion is real, but if it is, then we also have time travel, because the post mentions that the zombie drug was announced on May 11.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] phutatorius@lemmy.zip 7 points 4 days ago (1 children)

So Trump flatlined and they brought him back? Big mistake if so.

[–] CmdrShepard49@sh.itjust.works 5 points 4 days ago (1 children)

No we can tell it wasn't him in the example because he said people were crying about their loved ones death.

[–] phutatorius@lemmy.zip 3 points 3 days ago

TEARS IN THEIR EYES, THEY SAID WELCOME BACK SIR!

[–] kibblebits@quokk.au 8 points 4 days ago

I can’t do this timeline.

[–] chahn.chris@piefed.social 5 points 4 days ago (4 children)

The possible of death are many.

A single drug could never avert all possible causes.

He and his followers believe in magic.

[–] backalleycoyote@lemmy.today 12 points 3 days ago (2 children)

Average MAGA Magic enthusiast.

[–] Tollana1234567@lemmy.today 4 points 3 days ago

they also love the wrath of god card its a white card that destroy all creatures and prevent regeneration.

[–] chahn.chris@piefed.social 2 points 3 days ago

Damn this is funny

[–] teyrnon@sh.itjust.works 2 points 3 days ago (1 children)

After several minutes it's meaningless to restart a heart anyway, as irreversible brain damage will occur. We already can restart a recently stopped heart by injecting them with epinephrine (adrenaline.)

[–] echodot@feddit.uk 2 points 2 days ago

That's alright, the patient can then start a new career in politics where possession of a functional frontal lobe is considered detrimental to career progression.

[–] Typhoon@lemmy.ca 4 points 4 days ago

They don't believe in magic. They want YOU to believe in magic.

[–] SaveTheTuaHawk@lemmy.ca 4 points 4 days ago

This is how scientists feel in public since 2025...

[–] CombatWombat@feddit.online 6 points 4 days ago (1 children)

What do you think he was talking about with his doctor that made them bring up a drug that brings people back from the dead?

The president went on to address how such medications get tested, adding, “And some [drugs] don’t work. You learn very fast. It’s called the ultimate test, I think, right? They test all these things. They use animals all over the place, they use everything to test because a person’s going to die.”

[–] Starik@lemmy.world 3 points 4 days ago (5 children)

Might have been some crank lobbying Trump to allow the sale of a particular snake oil.

load more comments (5 replies)
[–] deacon@lemmy.world 4 points 4 days ago

Right to Try Act

I’m going off rip here because I haven’t educated myself on it, but this seems suspiciously like the Citizen’s United of human testing at first glance and because Trump is promoting it.

[–] DarkFuture@lemmy.world 3 points 4 days ago

He should try one that does the opposite.

[–] SupraMario@lemmy.world 4 points 4 days ago (1 children)

The turnip saw someone wake up from anesthesia...

[–] Inucune@lemmy.world 3 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Or someone get hit with narcan during an OD.

[–] SupraMario@lemmy.world 1 points 4 days ago

See see! Back from the dead, he was the best dead, and now he's the best alive.

[–] shweddy@lemmy.world 3 points 4 days ago (3 children)
[–] Witchfire@lemmy.world 2 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago) (1 children)
[–] Tollana1234567@lemmy.today 2 points 3 days ago

hes kept alive by nose powder. Lich and the elderly congress people have thier phylacteries.

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] rozodru@piefed.world 2 points 4 days ago (2 children)

yeah you know what with the way things have been going at this point it honestly wouldn't surprise me if the Umbrella Corporation actually existed an the T-Virus was a real thing. I'm just waiting for them to announce a couple dudes named Spencer and Wesker being named to some position in the administration.

load more comments (2 replies)
load more comments
view more: next ›