this post was submitted on 20 Aug 2025
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[–] dogslayeggs@lemmy.world 80 points 1 day ago (1 children)

"If you ever fall off the Sears Tower, just go real limp, because maybe you’ll look like a dummy and people will try to catch you because, hey, free dummy.”

[–] some_guy@lemmy.sdf.org 62 points 1 day ago (2 children)

“If trees could scream, would we be so cavalier about cutting them down? We might, if they screamed all the time, for no good reason.”

-Jack Handy

[–] umbraroze@slrpnk.net 1 points 16 hours ago

"Hmm. I wonder. I was thinking of dancing trees. Now I'm wondering what's next. Screaming trees. Yeah. That's got to be the answer. Screaming trees." - private notes by Hans Reiser, filesystem designer and a convicted murderer

(OK, that's a fake quote. This one is real:)

"Trees have their roots pointing up. And if you cut a tree apart, you get a forest. No, I'm not drunk." - one of my computer science profs, on data structures

[–] tetris11@lemmy.ml 10 points 1 day ago (1 children)
[–] dylanmorgan@slrpnk.net 17 points 1 day ago (2 children)

Jack Handey was an SNL writer, “Deep Thoughts” was a series of one-liners that aired between sketches in the early 90s.

[–] QuoVadisHomines@sh.itjust.works 8 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Loved finding out he was a real person and was a legendary writer.

[–] spankmonkey@lemmy.world 10 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (2 children)

Oh shit, I always thought it was a fictional name that the writers used for the random stuff that come up during the writing process. Didn't know it was a real person!

Holy shit, he created Toonces!

Handey is also credited with creating Toonces the Driving Cat, the cat who could drive a car, although not very well.

[–] prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 14 hours ago* (last edited 14 hours ago)

SNL had a bunch of absolutely legendary writers. Jim Downey is another one

[–] masterofn001@lemmy.ca 6 points 1 day ago (1 children)

This has completely changed everything I ever held dear and holy.

I always thought handy was a Hartman character and was him reading.

To find out it was neither Hartman's character nor his voice is .... everything was a lie.

[–] spankmonkey@lemmy.world 2 points 1 day ago

Hartman did the intro.

[–] mdhughes@lemmy.sdf.org 1 points 19 hours ago

His books are also fun, The Stench of Honolulu was good, the opposite of a hard-boiled PI.