Not The Onion

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Defense Secy. Hegseth: "The Only Thing Prohibiting Transit in the Straits Right Now is Iran Shooting at Shipping" (www.c-span.org)

submitted 13 hours ago by zero_gravitas@aussie.zone to c/nottheonion@lemmy.world

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[–] LifeInMultipleChoice@lemmy.world 7 points 12 hours ago* (last edited 12 hours ago) (1 children)

We attacked Florida and demanded that they don't cut off traffic to Alabama through the Gulf of Mexico. Except it isn't nearly that wide, it's 35x smaller

[–] FuglyDuck@lemmy.world 14 points 11 hours ago (2 children)

I mean. We should probably build a wall around Florida.

Republican goobers like catchy names. We could call it “America’s Cock Ring.”

[–] WanderingThoughts@europe.pub 1 points 8 hours ago (1 children)

build a wall around Florida.

"So that wall is to keep it the hurricanes?"

[–] FuglyDuck@lemmy.world 1 points 7 hours ago

"It's for when the climate change causes shrinkage!" (to keep the swamp trolls out. when their swamps become lagoons)

[–] P00ptart@lemmy.world 1 points 8 hours ago

You'd be surprised how popular that would be both in context and out.