this post was submitted on 09 Sep 2024
532 points (98.7% liked)

Memes

45734 readers
683 users here now

Rules:

  1. Be civil and nice.
  2. Try not to excessively repost, as a rule of thumb, wait at least 2 months to do it if you have to.

founded 5 years ago
MODERATORS
 
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] ImplyingImplications@lemmy.ca 50 points 2 months ago (4 children)

I knew a priest who liked to say he only smoked after sex.

[–] Rolando@lemmy.world 27 points 2 months ago

"With cigarettes, my wife and I, we made a deal. We only smoke after sex. I've got the same pack now since 1975. What bothers me is my wife. She's up to three packs a day!” -Rodney Dangerfield

[–] Skullgrid@lemmy.world 17 points 2 months ago (1 children)

exposing the poor traumatised kids to second hand smoke on top? talk about adding insult to injury

[–] Klear@lemmy.world 11 points 2 months ago

I think the kids are bottom, not top.

[–] driving_crooner@lemmy.eco.br 7 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Sadly, he passed away after being pancaked by drunk dump truck driver.

[–] CluckN@lemmy.world 10 points 2 months ago

I remember the funeral home was closed so they just slid him under the door.

[–] Imgonnatrythis@sh.itjust.works 4 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Uncomfortable forced laughter.

[–] ImplyingImplications@lemmy.ca 5 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I knew another priest who loved making "wife bad" boomer jokes at funerals whenever a surviving spouse died. Lots of "Her husband has been enjoying paradise in heaven...and now his wife is there..." and "st. Peter gives a test to enter heaven, you need to spell 'love'. St. Peter wants a break and gives this task to a man who sees his wife coming to the pearly gates. He tells his wife that she must spell a word before entering heaven. His wife asks what the word is. The man says 'onamonapia'"

Those definitely got some uncomfortable laughs

[–] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.world 4 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Where are you finding all these awful priests? Are you secretly the pope?

[–] ImplyingImplications@lemmy.ca 4 points 2 months ago

I was a funeral director. I got to know all the religious leaders in my town.