this post was submitted on 01 Apr 2024
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Memes

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[–] neptune@dmv.social 89 points 1 year ago (2 children)

He was openly spreading propaganda against the lawful government too!

The dude was clearly a russian bot

[–] Lucidlethargy@sh.itjust.works 57 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Modern conservative Christians would have hated Jesus. Seriously.

[–] frezik@midwest.social 5 points 1 year ago

In the story, they are the Sadducees. Jesus scoffed at them. He went up against the Pharisees more, but that's something like a modern American leftist arguing against the Democrats. They tend to agree 95% of the time, at least on paper.

[–] melpomenesclevage@lemm.ee -2 points 1 year ago

When I used to, like, try and be a good person, I often got to point out to Christians that I was the closest thing they would ever meet to their messiah. Watching their faces was so fun.

[–] Son_of_dad@lemmy.world 56 points 1 year ago

He's got long hair and wearing a dress, clearly one of those trans. Crucify it!

[–] altima_neo@lemmy.zip 26 points 1 year ago (5 children)

But what if he turned into back into water?

But also, wasn't the wine also his blood? Did he have like an blood alcohol level of 100%?

[–] NegativeLookBehind@lemmy.world 20 points 1 year ago (2 children)

And doesn’t this make Catholics cannibals?

[–] Steve@startrek.website 22 points 1 year ago (2 children)

The catholics explicitly state that those crackers are the actual, literal “body of christ” so yes they are cannibals, and they like it.

[–] NegativeLookBehind@lemmy.world 12 points 1 year ago (1 children)

It’s ok to eat a guy, just don’t be gay with him

[–] Steve@startrek.website 8 points 1 year ago

Just don’t tell anyone

[–] numlok@lemmy.world 3 points 1 year ago

Catholics are literally Trans.

[–] SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world 9 points 1 year ago

And vampires.

[–] EvilLootbox@lemmy.world 8 points 1 year ago

Auto-brewery Syndrome

Isn't wine only like 12-15%?

[–] melpomenesclevage@lemm.ee 5 points 1 year ago

Basically all those miracles are pretty easy sleight of hand.

Turn one fish into ten? Just requires a huge bag. Turn water into wine? It takes a few months, but the hard part is doing it well, not doing it at all. Turning blood into booze? You just need some everclear and an IV needle.

[–] Jorgelino@lemmy.ml 2 points 1 year ago

I think the blood thing was just for the last supper.

[–] reverendsteveii@lemm.ee 19 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

"Hey did you hear about Mary's kid? Yeah, the commie. They picked him up on Friday. I knew some shit was gonna go down, but it's a shame. He made us a really nice table back in the day."

[–] Mostly_Gristle@lemmy.world 19 points 1 year ago

As noted biblical historian Andrew Zaltzman has often pointed out, Pontius Pilate was a law-and-order administrator and Jesus was absolutely guilty under the law at the time.

[–] steeznson@lemmy.world 17 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Thought this was a linux joke initially given the volume of them on lemmy

[–] LEDZeppelin@lemmy.world 12 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] Wes_Dev@lemmy.ml 8 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Wasn't "woke" originally a good term until right wing screechers took it over at an insult? They do that a lot, every time some positive phrase or idea starts to gain traction. Seems intentional.

[–] PresidentCamacho@lemm.ee 10 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Poisoning a word that means "not ignorant of the systems of oppression in the world" sounds like a great game plan for the oppressor.

[–] melpomenesclevage@lemm.ee 7 points 1 year ago

Its still good. Their scorn is a badge of pride.

[–] WarmSoda@lemm.ee 10 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Quick, drink his blood and eat his flesh!

[–] boatsnhos931@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] WarmSoda@lemm.ee 1 points 1 year ago

It's heavenly.

[–] Track_Shovel@slrpnk.net 7 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Is this a common thing said by conservatives?

[–] ryannathans@aussie.zone 5 points 1 year ago

Proton actually but close enough