this post was submitted on 27 Jan 2026
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Not The Onion

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[–] PointyFluff@lemmy.ml 9 points 5 hours ago

Cool. Now do ICE.

[–] protist@mander.xyz 30 points 7 hours ago (1 children)

Prosecutors said Hughes had been drinking and watching the Kansas City Chiefs defeat the Philadelphia Eagles in the Super Bowl at the bar that night, along with Brewer. After leaving the bar, Hughes urinated on the rear wall of the building.

Lloyd Preston Brewer III, who owns the building but not the bar, confronted Hughes and then shot him once in the torso, killing him. He later claimed that he had acted in self-defense, telling police he feared for his life when he saw a group of people gathering in the parking lot and noticed Hughes urinating on the wall.

“He came at me in a threatening manner and appeared he was reaching for something on his side,” Brewer told police, according to The Miami Herald. Brewer said he warned Hughes before drawing his weapon.

But prosecutors said security footage and eyewitness testimony directly contradicted that account.

“There is no justifiable claim to self-defense because the kid was never armed and never advanced on the shooter, the shooter advanced on him,” Assistant Monroe County State Attorney Joseph Mansfield said.

[–] NobodyElse@sh.itjust.works 32 points 6 hours ago (1 children)

He tried the cop defense, right down to the contradicting video evidence. Guess it only works for them.

[–] Fedizen@lemmy.world 12 points 5 hours ago* (last edited 5 hours ago)

Honestly lying about a shooting should double the time in prison and qualify it as a murder. There is no world where the gamble murderers should be making is saying they were scared. Guns aren't stuffed animals and people shouldn't be owning them because they're scared. Anyone making that claim to shoot an unarmed person (including cops) should be barred from ever owning a gun because they are safety hazard.

It should be them saying "I was so angry I saw only red, I didn't mean to shoot him" to try and get manslaughter instead of murder.

[–] Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world 50 points 8 hours ago (1 children)

I'm gonna go urinate onthis guys property

[–] NoForwadSlashS@piefed.social 24 points 8 hours ago (3 children)

From the headline alone that sounds like a dangerous idea.

[–] Lodespawn@aussie.zone 15 points 6 hours ago

What's he gonna do, grumble loudly from prison? Really need to find a way to start a viral internet meme where people film themselves urinating on his property.

[–] AmidFuror@fedia.io 19 points 8 hours ago (1 children)

Yeah, but look at the username.

[–] Jerb322@lemmy.world 4 points 6 hours ago

If they live in Florida, it tracks.

[–] Nurse_Robot@lemmy.world 5 points 8 hours ago

Careful, or you'll be next

[–] Gsus4@programming.dev 12 points 7 hours ago* (last edited 7 hours ago) (1 children)

In Florida, the Big Lebowski could have been a much shorter film...

[–] hydrashok@sh.itjust.works 4 points 5 hours ago

Ver is de money, Lebowski?

gunshots

roll credits

[–] TheReturnOfPEB@reddthat.com 4 points 6 hours ago

urine trouble, mister.

[–] slothrop@lemmy.ca 6 points 7 hours ago (2 children)

Is the dead guy just taking the piss?

[–] harmbugler@piefed.social 3 points 7 hours ago (1 children)
[–] wreckedcarzz@lemmy.world 2 points 6 hours ago (1 children)

That's always been a really weird phrase, 'I gotta go take a piss/shit' like my man why are you reaching around very confused people as they are sitting down defecating and stealing their waste?

[–] Grimy@lemmy.world 2 points 5 hours ago

I only take my own, thanks

[–] Alcoholicorn@mander.xyz 1 points 6 hours ago

Least psychotic small business owner.

[–] Maeve@kbin.earth -4 points 8 hours ago
[–] BigBolillo@mgtowlemmy.org -4 points 8 hours ago (1 children)

The next time he will think twice before urinating in lucifer property's

[–] surewhynotlem@lemmy.world 2 points 6 hours ago

Lucifer gets a bad rep. He was just doing what he was supposed to do.

This guy is no Lucifer.