this post was submitted on 22 Apr 2025
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cross-posted from: https://lemmy.world/post/28523918

This made me laugh incredibly hard, so had to cross post it.

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[–] FuglyDuck@lemmy.world 36 points 16 hours ago (3 children)

fun fact... killing jesus was always god's plan. god set adam and eve up in the garden specifically so he could LARP as a Nice Guy™. In fact, not killing jesus would have condemned humanity to eternal suffering, and therefore would have been sin. Not that anyone had a choice, because it's all part of god's plan, right, and god's plan always comes to fruition.

If you believe in that sort of thing.

[–] Sterile_Technique@lemmy.world 21 points 13 hours ago (6 children)
[–] SkunkWorkz@lemmy.world 18 points 12 hours ago (1 children)

The Abrahamic god is literally a war god. It evolved from El and Yahweh, members of the pantheon of the polytheistic Canaanite religion. El is the father of all gods and Yahweh is a weather and war god. So yeah no wonder that the Abrahamic god does crazy evil shit. Like killing all first born sons.

[–] Thedogdrinkscoffee@lemmy.ca 4 points 7 hours ago

You just inspired another wikipedia rabbit hole. See you in a week!

[–] FuglyDuck@lemmy.world 7 points 12 hours ago (1 children)

Fortunately; if god is real he got bored with this particular video game and moved onto some thing more exciting.

[–] futatorius@lemm.ee 4 points 12 hours ago (1 children)

Yep, we're living in God's ant farm and he's a bored toddler. And one day he'll show up with a magnifying glass and have a laugh.

[–] derpgon@programming.dev 4 points 11 hours ago (1 children)

As long as Trump sizzles out before I do, I will be a happy man.

[–] FuglyDuck@lemmy.world 4 points 11 hours ago (1 children)

Dude looks like he's a few hamberders away from croaking. but i've been saying that for a year or two now.

[–] derpgon@programming.dev 1 points 4 hours ago

If life taught me anything, there is always room for dessert, and an extra hambie.

[–] Gradually_Adjusting@lemmy.world 7 points 13 hours ago

That's why I'm an atheist. I'm too optimistic.

[–] brax@sh.itjust.works 4 points 13 hours ago (1 children)

Doesn't the Bible go on and on about how the devil is the great deceiver? Seems accurate considering how many people think God was the good guy.

[–] HawlSera@lemm.ee 1 points 12 hours ago

What do you think the word "Deceiver" means in this context?

[–] Klear@sh.itjust.works 2 points 12 hours ago

He could be just really, really stupid.

[–] futatorius@lemm.ee 1 points 12 hours ago

My belief is that, if there ever was a god, he looked at the world he created and died of Christian pity.

[–] orbituary@lemmy.dbzer0.com 23 points 16 hours ago (1 children)
[–] thisbenzingring@lemmy.sdf.org 13 points 16 hours ago

you say that now but when the (checks current feelings are still, oh good) flames of (checks notebook on latest revisions, hahah stupid assholes) HELL are kissing your feet while a succubus sits on your face and.... ok brb this is fuckin hot...

[–] Reverendender@sh.itjust.works 16 points 16 hours ago* (last edited 16 hours ago)