Greentext

Welcome to java, we have a couple unconventional ways of doing things, but overall I'm like every other mainstream oo language.

People: AHH! Scary!

Welcome to python. your knowledge of me wont help you elsewhere as my syntax is purposefully obtuse and unique. Forget about semicolons, one missed space and your code is as worthless as you after learning this language.

People: Hello based department

Python:

print("Hello world!")

This is getting a little better nowadays.

> cat Hello.java
void main() {
    System.out.println("Hello, World!");
}
> java --enable-preview Hello.java
Hello, World!

Things to notice:

1. No compilation step.
2. No class declaration.
3. Main method is not public static
4. No String[] args.

This still uses preview features though. However, like you demonstrated already, compilation is no longer a required step for simplistic programs like this.

He types REALLY slow.

JVM is like a gas. It expands to fit it's container, however large that is.

Sorry, you had a small error in the spacings of your post; Therefore I cannot parse a thing you're saying. Didn't mean to scare you with a semicolon either. It's just a tool in language's to end a clause and begin a related, independent clause. That could be useful somewhere...

As embedded dev, the stack trace alone scares me. It would be funny to watch the Java runtime blow the 8 frame deep stack on a PIC18 tho

Honestly, I prefer C to Java, it's incredibly simple without all the BS that Java throws at you:

• interfaces - compiler will fail if you provide the wrong types; w/ Java, figuring out what types to pass is an effort unto itself
• functions - everything needs to be in a class; even callback functions are wrapped in a class (behind the scenes if you use modern Java); in C, you just pass a function
• performance - Java uses a stop the world GC, which can cause issues if you have enough data churn; in C, you decide when/if you want to allocate or free memory, no surprises

There are certainly some bad parts, but all in all, when I run into an issue in C, I know it's my fault, whereas in Java, there are a million reasons why my assumptions could be considered valid, and I have to dig around the docs to find that one sentence that tells me where I went wrong w/ the stuff I chose.

That said, I prefer Rust to both because:

• get fancy stack traces like I do in Java (I really miss stack traces in C)
• compiler catches most of my stupid mistakes, Java will just throw exceptions
• still no stupid interface hell, I just satisfy a specific trait and we're good
• generally pretty concise for what it is; I can rarely point to a piece of syntax and say it's unnecessary

I use:

• Python - scripting and small projects
• Rust - serious projects or things that need to be fast
• Go - relatively simple IO-heavy projects that need to be pretty fast
• C - embedded stuff where I don't want to mess w/ the Rust toolchain

Java has been absent from my toolbox for well over a decade, and I actively avoid it to this day because it causes me to break out in hives.

Rust over there like

Hey kid, tired of putting off your problems?

So will so many better languages, more so actually.

So will pretty much anything except JS.

Java is amazing and I love it, and I agree that this is not really a good list of problems. (Not that I expect green texts to be well thought out, rational, real, fair, or anything other than hyperbolic rants lol.) There are good reasons to critique it and the ways people use it, but this isn't it.

Particularly funny is the one about race conditions. That's something you'd have to deal with in any sort of multi threaded environment.