this post was submitted on 13 Aug 2025
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Greentext

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This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

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[–] 4cher0n@lemmy.dbzer0.com 6 points 14 hours ago

Sounds like the Dying earth series / cugels saga - fantastic if you like weird dark fantasy https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cugel's_Saga

[–] flapperfivethousand@sh.itjust.works 24 points 22 hours ago* (last edited 21 hours ago) (1 children)

The thing about Stephen King is he doesn't usually plan his stories. He just writes and goes where it takes him. Hence, they sometimes go to funny places.

[–] Unbecredible@sh.itjust.works 5 points 18 hours ago (2 children)

FUCK, was this a Dark Tower spoiler??? I keep meaning to read past the first book.

[–] tetris11@feddit.uk 6 points 18 hours ago

Dont read past the first book. Preserve whatever mystery and intrigue you have.

Beyond lies mary sue madness involving star wars, spiderman and harry potter. Wish I was joking.

[–] Gloomy@mander.xyz 2 points 15 hours ago* (last edited 15 hours ago)

Best series i have read, ever. Read it.

[–] Dasus@lemmy.world 5 points 16 hours ago
[–] CheeseNoodle@lemmy.world 42 points 1 day ago (2 children)

This is why you just shoot the fucker and don't try and do a one liner.

[–] Bluewing@lemmy.world 28 points 1 day ago

To quote the great philosopher Tuco, "When you got to shoot, shoot. Don't talk."

[–] lessthanluigi@lemmy.sdf.org 21 points 1 day ago (2 children)

Or you do the one liner after the shot.

[–] ArmchairAce1944@discuss.online 10 points 1 day ago (1 children)
[–] thermal_shock@lemmy.world 9 points 22 hours ago

Tight! Tight!

[–] Chakravanti@monero.town 2 points 21 hours ago

That's what Betty did.

[–] TheGreenWizard@lemmy.zip 5 points 21 hours ago

Ah, the o'l "send them to the desert" bit. Works every time.

[–] halvar@lemy.lol 59 points 1 day ago (2 children)

fake: no it isn't, i'm the evil wizard and this has definitely happened, i'm just not sure which one of the 17 guys that regularly show up this is

gay: I'm quite certain they all have feelings for me

[–] Honytawk@feddit.nl 10 points 1 day ago (2 children)

Why do you call yourself evil?

Aren't you just misunderstood?

[–] halvar@lemy.lol 13 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Kids these days don't understand the joy of being the evil wizard and knowing it.

[–] answersplease77@lemmy.world 5 points 1 day ago (1 children)

what did this guy do to get banished to the desert the first time?

[–] halvar@lemy.lol 4 points 22 hours ago (1 children)

He impersonated me on the internet

[–] tetris11@feddit.uk 3 points 18 hours ago (1 children)

*grabs a pair of basketballs and holds them over crotch*
"Ooh looketmeee I'm haalvaaar...!"

[–] halvar@lemy.lol 2 points 16 hours ago

off to the desert you go

[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 9 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Everyone else just misunderstands that evil isn't bad, it's just "live" spelled backwards.

[–] WorldsDumbestMan@lemmy.today 2 points 23 hours ago

I always knew life was evil. That's why youvshould be an eilfilist

fake: excuse me I'm schmevil at worst and oh you're describing yourself

gay: okay got us there

[–] UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 129 points 1 day ago

Third time's the char-

🏜️

[–] phoenixz@lemmy.ca 38 points 1 day ago (3 children)

And that is why you don't state your evil intentions, you just do it

[–] Empricorn@feddit.nl 4 points 20 hours ago (1 children)
[–] tetris11@feddit.uk 4 points 18 hours ago

And Gwyneth Paltrow

[–] Mika@sopuli.xyz 5 points 1 day ago

But it works in anime 🙄

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[–] Cruxifux@feddit.nl 71 points 1 day ago (19 children)

This is pretty much the synopsis of The Gunslinger by Steven King.

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[–] lessthanluigi@lemmy.sdf.org 32 points 1 day ago (4 children)

Anon plays Banished, a medieval city builder

[–] enbipanic@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 19 hours ago

This comment makes me miss TotalBiscuit :(

His banished review is my only exposure to the game

[–] javiwhite@feddit.uk 5 points 1 day ago (3 children)

Ahh banished, The local cleric being replaced by a villager called 'Demon' remains one of my only steam screenshots.

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[–] balderdash9@lemmy.zip 18 points 1 day ago (7 children)

Can't find another game quite like it tbh

[–] snowsuit2654@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 22 hours ago

Timberborn is pretty fun and plays quite similarly.

[–] Clearwater@lemmy.world 11 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Banished is fun. Rimworld is fun and addictive as crack.

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[–] tedd_deireadh@lemmy.world 31 points 1 day ago (1 children)

This sounds like a Dark Tower reference. Thankee, sai.

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