this post was submitted on 14 Jan 2026
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[–] StrawberryPigtails@lemmy.sdf.org 152 points 1 week ago (4 children)

I would think they first would have to actually release the feature.

[–] Peruvian_Skies@sh.itjust.works 53 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

And I would think that before releasing the feature they'd have to get it to stop constantly crashibg cars into large stationary objects.

It's probably vibe-coded.

[–] UnspecificGravity@piefed.social 18 points 1 week ago (1 children)

You misunderstand. The subscription is to get permission to drive your own car. Self driving slop is going to be the default.

Surely you jest.

[–] hummingbird@lemmy.world 45 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Apparently we live in a reality in which you don't need to have a product in order make it shit anymore.

[–] SkybreakerEngineer@lemmy.world 8 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] ryannathans@aussie.zone 5 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Star citizen is very playable right now, which is more than can be said for the full self driving

[–] JcbAzPx@lemmy.world 5 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Yeah, it is an incredible vitual storefront. So many ways to spend money.

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[–] amateurcrastinator@lemmy.world 15 points 1 week ago

You need to sign up for a 3 year subscription to be put on the waiting list for the product that will be ready in 5 years after you subscribed. If you don't renew after the first 3 years you lose your spot and need to reapply.

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[–] Dogiedog64@lemmy.world 87 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Anyone who still thinks he's a genius should be mocked mercilessly.

[–] TigerAce@lemmy.dbzer0.com 20 points 1 week ago

To be fair, he's a genius in continuesly scamming people without losing their faith in him. Although it's less geniusness and more stupidity of other people. Yeah he's not a genius, he's a scammer. Not even an artist at it.

[–] THE_GR8_MIKE@lemmy.world 39 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Surprised it didn't happen sooner.

And on that note, I would absolutely download a car.

[–] kn33@lemmy.world 26 points 1 week ago

Well, I wouldn't download this car.

[–] TranscendentalEmpire@lemmy.today 34 points 1 week ago (3 children)

Kinda a crazy move considering that they were charging 8k for "fsd" before, and are moving to a monthly subscription of a hundred bucks a month.

You would have to own your Tesla for six and a half years for them to make the same return. My guess is that the hundred dollars a month is just the initial price which will drastically inflate over time. That or they are just going to raise prices by 8k and still charge you a subscription cost anyways....

[–] the_tab_key@lemmy.world 25 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Or you get more people buying in. 8k up front looks a lot different than a couple hundred a month.

[–] THE_GR8_MIKE@lemmy.world 12 points 1 week ago (2 children)

I'd rather just pay it once and have it.

Like video games. Just let me pay money for the whole game.

[–] trougnouf@lemmy.world 10 points 1 week ago

Rational people don't buy Teslas.

[–] acosmichippo@lemmy.world 5 points 1 week ago (4 children)

the problem is it's non-transferrable, so if you want to sell the car (or totaled it) before ~6 years you would lose money compared to paying $100/month.

[–] boonhet@sopuli.xyz 5 points 1 week ago

Oh that's just another nail in the coffin of me EVER buying a Tesla

If it was transferable like idk, any other option you get on your car, the 8k price tag could at least be offset by like 20-50% by the car having better value when selling it on. This way it's just... Wtf. Imagine paying 8k and then selling the car after a year and the next person has to pay 8k too.

100 bucks a month starting to seem reasonable in comparison indeed

[–] XLE@piefed.social 4 points 1 week ago (1 children)

What? Purchasing a premium package for your car vanishes when it transfers to a new owner?

If you buy a premium trim, it doesn't vanish if you resell the car.

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[–] baggachipz@sh.itjust.works 12 points 1 week ago (1 children)

At one point they were charging $15k for it, and Elmo was claiming it would go to $100k in its final form. You know, when it actually fucking worked. Which it never will.

[–] Ilovethebomb@sh.itjust.works 6 points 1 week ago (2 children)

They seem to be dropping the price until they find a price point where a decent percentage of their users will actually pay for the service.

If the system was genuinely self driving, as in the vehicle could run unattended, it would be worth having.

[–] baggachipz@sh.itjust.works 8 points 1 week ago

I bought it for my Tesla (back when I had it) for $2500. Shitty decision, but I believed the hype. Can’t wait to get my $5 check from the class action suit.

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[–] Ilovethebomb@sh.itjust.works 11 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Nah, I suspect nobody was buying the feature. They may increase the price if they get it to truly work, but I suspect a hundred odd a month is what most people are willing to pay.

[–] hitmyspot@aussie.zone 10 points 1 week ago

Yes, I suspect this is a chas flow thing. Their sales are dropping. The feature is there, sonit costs nothing to give it. See if they can milk a few dollars. Even if it makes less money on the long term, it might stop the share price crashing in the medium or short term.

[–] Jayve@lemmy.world 33 points 1 week ago

If you buy a Tesla you deserve a Tesla.

[–] devolution@lemmy.world 22 points 1 week ago (1 children)

$99 dollars a month to kill yourself. Shit, I can commit suicide for free.

[–] phoenixz@lemmy.ca 18 points 1 week ago

Then first create the full self driving that you have lied about already existing for the past decade

[–] Maeve@kbin.earth 17 points 1 week ago

🤣🤣🤣

[–] tonywu@lemmy.world 17 points 1 week ago

Tesla: subscribe to your own demise.

[–] garretble@lemmy.world 16 points 1 week ago

I feel so dumb over here having paid off my current car and giving no subscription money to anyone to use all the features of my car. I'm a fool!

[–] ScoffingLizard@lemmy.dbzer0.com 15 points 1 week ago

You have got to be a goddamn moron to buy a Tesla.

[–] buddascrayon@lemmy.world 15 points 1 week ago (1 children)

On Tesla’s third-quarter earnings call in October, CFO Vaibhav Taneja said that “the total paid FSD customer base is still small, around 12% of our current fleet.”

Gonna be lower soon. LoL 😂

How is this fool a billionaire? Oh, yeah. Peter Thiel using him as a distraction.

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[–] MuskyMelon@lemmy.world 14 points 1 week ago (4 children)

Another Musk business model that'll die... But not before he grifts stupid shareholders...

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[–] SinningStromgald@lemmy.world 13 points 1 week ago

Didn't need another reason not to buy a Tesla but I've got one.

[–] Gathorall@lemmy.world 12 points 1 week ago

Can you opt to pay imaginary money for it since it is an imaginary feature?

[–] titanicx@lemmy.zip 11 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Wasn't it already? Fucking Tesla is so damn confusing on how the hell this shit works. Every 2 months it changes, price changes, how the use it changes, and if they even get it. God I'm so glad I wouldn't ever buy one of those shit boxes.

[–] ScoffingLizard@lemmy.dbzer0.com 5 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I was in my friend's Tesla the other day, and she couldn't figure out which button to push to get the glove box open. There is no handle. Just a screen with a GUI that has menus with a glove box button.

I was like wtf. I'm so pissed about my old car with too many buttons for the air conditioner. That was the most infuriating looking car I've ever seen. Guess she got it before the Nazi salute for tax write off.

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[–] WanderWisley@lemmy.world 11 points 1 week ago (2 children)

So if your subscription runs out while driving does the Tesla just stop on the road or does it immediately drive back to the dealership till you pay it?

[–] hateisreality@lemmy.world 4 points 1 week ago (1 children)
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[–] LordFireCrotch@lemmy.today 4 points 1 week ago

It's only for the "Full Self driving" feature. It would likely just disable the feature.

[–] DarkFuture@lemmy.world 11 points 1 week ago

No thanks, Nazi.

[–] Kyrex@lemmy.frozeninferno.xyz 9 points 1 week ago

Oh jeez, enshittification is so fast with today's companies...

[–] Etterra@discuss.online 9 points 1 week ago

Fools and their money are soon parted - over and over again if they're Tesla fanboys.

[–] echodot@feddit.uk 7 points 1 week ago

Good maybe people will stop using it then. What am I saying they bought a Tesla of course they're going to keep using it.

[–] FreddiesLantern@leminal.space 7 points 1 week ago

“Oh think I’ll treat myself to a month of gamble driving”

[–] Jarix@lemmy.world 4 points 1 week ago

Scumfuck needs to hit his trillion dollar payout somehow

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