this post was submitted on 16 Mar 2026
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Greentext

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This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

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[–] thatsTheCatch@lemmy.nz 70 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Withdrawal of anything would include anxiety symptoms, I imagine

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[–] TheTechnician27@lemmy.world 36 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

Broadly speaking, anxiety is an elevated mood; the reason stimulants exacerbate anxiety is the same reason stimulants are contraindicated in people with bipolar disorder. For someone trying to achieve concentration while suffering from an anxiety disorder, a prescription medication like guanfacine might be better if possible; it has an off-label usage for anxiety disorders, and its two main usages are in treating ADHD and lowering blood pressure (neurostimulants like caffeine, by contrast, elevate your blood pressure).

Caffeine withdrawal thankfully only lasts about a week at the worst.

[–] Gladaed@feddit.org 9 points 1 week ago (2 children)

As in the severe symptoms last upto a week? Because I would have expected long term changes such as resistance and mild tiredness without it to last longer.

[–] LORDSMEGMA@sh.itjust.works 14 points 1 week ago

I'd expect the long term effects to be more psychological. Such as thinking you can only feel awake with caffeine

[–] village604@adultswim.fan 5 points 1 week ago

Physical dependency is only 7-10 days, but the psychological addiction can last for however long your brain decides.

[–] davetortoise@reddthat.com 22 points 1 week ago (9 children)

Caffeine is lowkey the most normalised and profitable drug addiction in the world, and it doesn't really even do anything. The whole 'giving you energy' thing is a myth, all it does it make you tired without it. That's why caffeine legally has to be listed as a 'flavouring' on the packaging, despite nobody on earth having a clue what it's supposed to taste like

[–] AnimalsDream@slrpnk.net 27 points 1 week ago (2 children)

The primary effect of caffeine is to block adenosine from getting to the adenosine receptors, and that hormone is generally associated with sleepiness. So it's kind of like caffeine creates an illusion that removes our awareness of sleepiness.

However this also has a cascade of secondary effects on the central nervous system that leead to things like blood pressure changes, improved lung function, increased cortisol and adrenaline levels, etc. Taken together, these things quite objectively generally result in greater feelings of alertness and energy. And anxiety.

As others have noted one case where it can have more of a calming effect is in people with adhd. It should also be noted that overconsumption of caffeine combined with other poor lifestyle choices quickly leads to chronic fatigue system, at which point no amount of additional caffeine is going to continue being helpful and it just becomes a slog of continuing to take it for no other reason than relief from withdrawal symptoms.

One dose a day is all that should be necessary - ideally taken as early as possible. It should also be noted that for most people in industrialized countries, coffee or tea might be their most significant and pretty much only reliable source of polyphenols.

And lastly don't forget the most important reason for drinking caffeinated beverages: the pooping!

[–] SuspciousCarrot78@lemmy.world 9 points 1 week ago

^that.

...Also worth pointing out: caffeine gets added to a lot of analgesic meds. So it’s very possible to have a background caffeine load and not even realize it, whether that’s from taking a couple of caffeine-containing painkillers or eating dark chocolate.

[–] kieron115@startrek.website 5 points 1 week ago

Correct, it has a quite similar structure to adenosine. So it can prevent you from getting more sleepy but it can't "kick out" the adenosine already bound to the receptors.

[–] SlurpingPus@lemmy.world 19 points 1 week ago (23 children)

The whole 'giving you energy' thing is a myth, all it does it make you tired without it.

Absolute nonsense. I don't drink coffee or tea, and if I drink a couple cups of coffee I end up with a hundred more tabs in the browser, two programming projects started and abandoned, a hundred notes tagged and reorganized, and a bunch of unnecessary and vaguely mean comments on Reddit and Lemmy. Possibly also a sore leg or shoulder from impromptu exercise.

You need to take control of your caffeine addiction.

[–] RamenJunkie@midwest.social 4 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Personally, I just want to take a nap after drinking coffee.

[–] HrabiaVulpes@europe.pub 6 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Check yourself for ADHD.

One of symptoms is that supposed stimulants have calming effect

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[–] Ricaz@lemmy.dbzer0.com 12 points 1 week ago

If you're not already addicted, caffeine can definitely pep you up quite a lot. Not in a comfortable way, though, in my opinion

[–] ivanafterall@lemmy.world 6 points 1 week ago (2 children)

I'll be that guy: SUGAR. Just try cutting it out of your life and tell me we're not all hopeless fiends.

[–] Honytawk@discuss.tchncs.de 10 points 1 week ago (9 children)

If you cut out sugar completely, your brain/central nervous system/red blood cells would break down.

We definitely consume too much sugar, but caffeine is not needed for anything.

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[–] UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 4 points 1 week ago (1 children)

SUGAR. Just try cutting it out of your life

dies

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[–] tigeruppercut@lemmy.zip 6 points 1 week ago (3 children)

all it does it make you tired without it.

Maybe if you're already taking it regularly this is true, but we know that it blocks some adenosine receptors, preventing the buildup of adenosine, which is one component in making us feel sleepy.

[–] colourlessidea@sopuli.xyz 5 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Yes it makes you feel less sleepy/tired but it doesn’t ’give you energy’ - just tricks the body into thinking it’s less tired than it actually is

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[–] UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 6 points 1 week ago (1 children)

most normalised and profitable drug addiction

Found the Mormon.

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well caffeine mostly makes me pee. it's a diuretic which means it makes you pee. that's the thing it's most effective for for me. other side effects include having an easier time shitting because it increases bowel movements. apart from that it is a mild stimulant that maybe makes me a bit more creative. i've observed it a couple of times but it's inconsistent.

[–] drmoose@lemmy.world 4 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

Caffeine absolutely does something what are you even talking about. There are thousands of research papers of what caffeine does.

https://psychonautwiki.org/wiki/Caffeine

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[–] ChickenLadyLovesLife@lemmy.world 21 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I quit smoking weed five years ago and I have no more anxiety. Food and sex aren't that great any more and everything is boring, but so what?

[–] AlexanderTheDead@lemmy.world 8 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I've heard that the longer you spent smoking before, the longer it takes for your body to readjust to the new happy chemical levels.

Maybe it'll get better for you soon?

[–] ChickenLadyLovesLife@lemmy.world 7 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Well, I was only a wake-and-baker for thirty years, so maybe you're right.

[–] Rooster326@programming.dev 3 points 1 week ago (1 children)
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[–] MutantTailThing@lemmy.world 16 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I have two moods. 1 calm 2 freaking the fuck out

[–] starman2112@sh.itjust.works 7 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)
[–] kamen@lemmy.world 14 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Reminds me of the case when anon found out that very cold and very spicy foods don't cancel each other out.

[–] tigeruppercut@lemmy.zip 8 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Pls tell me this was based on a greentext about anon shoving a hot sauce popsicle up his ass

[–] kamen@lemmy.world 8 points 1 week ago

No, I'm pretty sure it was about eating. But hey, whatever tickles your imagination...

[–] RamenJunkie@midwest.social 6 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Be me

Bet I can consume an entire Ghost Pepper

$4 on the line

Rember cold is opposite of hot

Grind up and freeze ghost pepper into a popsicle

Take a lick

Still incredibly spicy

Still need that $4

Realize the bet was to consume not eat

Popsicle looks like a dick

Shove popsicle up ass

Burning pain

At least I had $4 in ones to buy some chips and a soda while at the ER waiting room.

if this greentext doesn't exist you should create it

[–] SaharaMaleikuhm@feddit.org 13 points 1 week ago

Never change anything. Got it.

[–] ruuster13@lemmy.zip 13 points 1 week ago

Or OP is neurodivergent and stimulants help their brain. As with all greentexts, autism should probably be the first suspect.

[–] FinjaminPoach@lemmy.world 12 points 1 week ago

Cutting out caffeine is so fucking hard because people try and bring you cups of tea or coffee all the time and then get upset if you say no thank you

And then there's the self will power because after abiut 2 days wsuccessfully without i will want some anyway and just succumb to offers of it

And then it's present in chocolate which is even harder to go without

[–] QueenHawlSera@sh.itjust.works 9 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

One time I got a contigo, and it got me drinking purified water for a week straight. It tasted so good, I felt better. I was urinating more often.

Then suddenly around the week mark. I felt violently ill, massive headaches. I don't feel like refilling the contigo, grab a can of coke instead. It tastes funny because I haven't had one in awhile.

Headache clears up immediately and I'm back to perfect health

Mfw, I have a caffine addiction.

[–] WorldsDumbestMan@lemmy.today 5 points 1 week ago (4 children)

Can't escape the caffeine T_T

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[–] nutsack@lemmy.dbzer0.com 8 points 1 week ago (2 children)

My anxiety is caused by my lack of ability to focus

[–] QueenHawlSera@sh.itjust.works 5 points 1 week ago (1 children)

My anxiety is caused by being a transwoman living in a state without Shield Laws.

[–] nutsack@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (7 children)

yea that sounds stressful on a regular basis

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[–] Skullgrid@lemmy.world 8 points 1 week ago

I did not respect drugs and now I have to suffer the consequences

If it affects your brain, it is a drug. Respect drugs.

[–] 11111one11111@lemmy.world 7 points 1 week ago

General rule of thumb in life: if you use withdrawl symptoms as the comparator to measure the vslue of a commitment you will never empirically understand the outcome of the effort.

[–] Simulation6@sopuli.xyz 5 points 1 week ago

Moderation is the key. Cut out a bit at a time over months.

Strong coffee just makes me feel shaky and uncomfortable, with a comedown 2 or 3 hours later that makes me crave sugar. That's really all I get from it. I've done pretty much all the drugs, this just seems like a crap one. I do like a cup of tea tho.

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