Technology

Man, Futurama was shockingly prescient, wasn't it.

Does anyone else remember Microsoft's amazingly tone deaf slide deck about how integrating their systems and making thing seamless across multiple platforms including mobile phones and laptops would allow people to work during any/every spare moment in their lives, like while commuting?

Businesses want to own every moment of your life not strictly required for continued existence. If they can normalize using sleep time for extra "passive" income by using your dream power or by just renting out "spare" brain computation power, they will.

CEO: "Did you know that people can do basic work during REM? And they won't even feel like they have worked after waking up. We can boost employee productivity by 40%!!"

I sort of already do. It's called dreaming about driving a car.

I think these folks forgot that random dreams play an important role in information processing. I'd rather not mess with that too much.

i hope you're joking but if you're not i assume you live in the bay area? if you want to go to their pitch tonight, here's its eventbrite.

Yeah, that'll go great when the car is suddenly driving 14 miles down the driveway of the house I lived at as a child - a driveway that is walkable in less than a minute - before entering the garage which is a large house that slightly resembles a place I used to work and has a view over a clock tower that may or may not be larger when you look at it from a different angle and I think I'll nap in this bed that's here.

Now tell me: Where is the car relative to its position when that five-second-long dream sequence began, and will that pedestrian ever walk again?

I mean, to be fair, they were.

What started as an allegory for the path of a trans person realizing they're trans and taking "the red pill" to find the reality of their world and escape "the Matrix" that forces them into a confined box in which they don't actually fit...

...turned into the dumbest bro'd out bullshit from people who think the "red pill" means you're the strongest smartest man who is has figured out society and you're a superman like Neo who can fly and shit.

Honestly, I'm on the side of executives on this one. Most people are too fucking stupid for it.