this post was submitted on 07 Nov 2024
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Greentext

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This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

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[–] JackbyDev@programming.dev 159 points 1 year ago (1 children)

She probably broke up because anon uses terms like "gay yelp"

[–] Rai@lemmy.dbzer0.com 14 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

I love when my partner gay yelps* tbh

[–] SkaveRat@discuss.tchncs.de 20 points 1 year ago

You should use more lube

[–] fossphi@lemm.ee 64 points 1 year ago (2 children)
[–] ICastFist@programming.dev 20 points 1 year ago (1 children)

There's a whole gay site dedicated to that

[–] DJDarren@thelemmy.club 15 points 1 year ago

Is it yelp.com?

[–] toynbee@lemmy.world 3 points 1 year ago
[–] bulwark@lemmy.world 61 points 1 year ago (2 children)

That reminds me of the time I took a date to go see "The Hills Have Eyes". It was a dine-in theater, and I had gotten breadsticks and marinara. We just sat down and started to eat, and the date was going pretty good. If you've ever seen that movie, the opening scene is a jump scare right off the bat. I had a mouth full of breadstick and was actively holding the cup full of marinara that I launched directly into her chest because I jumped. Anyways, the date didn't work out and it was pretty awkward for the rest of the movie.

[–] Stalinwolf@lemmy.ca 2 points 1 year ago

Should have gone out with the Italian chick instead.

[–] driving_crooner@lemmy.eco.br 1 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Another bad one I had once, we we're in a really good Mexican close the theater and it was really good, we were chatting and laughing, until the nachos came by. She started to take all the fully loaded nachos, you know, the ones that are full of cheese and meat, leaving me only the ones that are just the chip. So I got up and went to talk to someone of the staff, to ask if they had some rule in the restaurant about one person eating all the fully loaded nachos alone, he said that they don't had one (pretty crazy that this is nor a regularly enforced thing, but wharever) and I asked him to please just go to our table and made the rule up. He was nice and help me, but my date felt it was very strange and asked him if I was the one who made up the rule, and he snitches me up! Can you believe it? So, she got upset and said that she was leaving, but it was too soon for the movie and she was like we're not going to the movie. The movies was good by the way, was this one with Santa, he was a cop and I heard he was paid 2M for that.

[–] topherclay@lemmy.world 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

we we're in a really good Mexican close the theater and it was really good.

[–] driving_crooner@lemmy.eco.br 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

The second really good was about the conversation, not the restaurant.

[–] topherclay@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago

It was an attempt to get you to proofread. I think you accidentally a restaurant.

[–] Fizz@lemmy.nz 2 points 1 year ago

You rolled and failed the charisma check. Unlucky because that could have been smooth.

[–] AI_toothbrush@lemmy.zip 25 points 1 year ago (1 children)

At that point i think its good that they broke up. Men have emotions.

[–] Wolf314159@startrek.website 9 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Also, isn't that the whole point of scary movies? I love scary movies and I show that by reacting to the good jump scares, gore, and creepiness. If it bored me so much I didn't react, I probably would find something else to watch. My partner gets a real kick out of watching me jump too.

[–] AI_toothbrush@lemmy.zip 3 points 1 year ago

Yeah but you have to keep in mind that most relationships are for show. What you have is a real relationship. You actually want to bond with the person and not just sex and social validation.

[–] rickyrigatoni@lemm.ee 10 points 1 year ago

Plot twist: It was the equestria girls movie.

[–] shalafi@lemmy.world 4 points 1 year ago

Gay yelp:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KF0I2h8xx-0

"Yeah, that's a bleepin' dead alien body..."

[–] Pornacount128@lemmynsfw.com 4 points 1 year ago

Anyone know what movie?

[–] knobpolisher@feddit.nl 3 points 1 year ago

Ah a shitpost

[–] njm1314@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago

What's that Bill Burr bit? The one about the bitch noises on the plane?