This is one instance where I'd say I'd actually prefer if he had an anime body pillow or real doll he was forming this sort of unhealthy attachment to.
this post was submitted on 23 May 2025
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I hate to break it to you, but that's a male spider and you're gay.
And this story is real, so it is Real AND Gay!
Loneliness affects people. And as gregariois animals we are, the closest possibility to connect, in any form, is taken.
Y'know... as lonely as I can get (and I get pretty lonely), that mosquito munching on my forearm is still getting a firm slap. Eventually.
Fight malaria when you can!
I feel so much more normal for just saying hello to my shower spider now.
My shower spider gets a reminder of our deal.
"You know the drill. You stay up there, I stay over here, nobody has to be injured today."
Sometimes the spider decides to come over to my side and gets flushed or squished, but they knew what was expected of them.
Real talk: people that save spiders and make it a moral thing confuse the heck out of me.
Like, if you were the spiders size proportionally to the spider, it would web you up and suck your blood for being in its home...
Be careful, though! This is the first step towards what anon describes!
Shower spider wants to watch you touch yourself
I know I have hidden spider bros because I haven't seen a single insect in my apartment in several years.
It's just the fact that I haven't seen any spiders in a while that makes me worried that I'm gonna lift something off the floor and see thousands of them or some shit lol
It might be centipedes. Those guys are apex predators of their microcosm.
I had a daddy longlegs in my bathroom for a while. My bathroom exhaust fan broke so the room would get super steamy, and I think the poor spider drowned, because it had clearly died in that spot, hanging from my ceiling.
I still feel a little sad about that spider-bro.
Probably didn't drown but might have gotten infected by mold. There's a reason spiders prefer dry places.
He's going to let a spider crawl on his penis in the name of gooning isn't he? I really want off this ride.
It happened long ago. Closer to you than you think
Whatever, more for me
Spider-bros are the best. I hope one day I can have a trained jumping spider sidekick on my shoulder.
Least weird greentext I've read for a while.
Look, everyone tries to fuck shower spider at some point. It's a rite of passage
Basically the Yukihiro Takahashi song “Grand Espoir”