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And that’s basically it!
What I'm hearing is that people should get naked in a reverse psychological leverage attitude?
threatening to his anti masturbation pact with his son?
D’oh, came here to post this. You win :).
Isn't that the most American statement ever. Belligerent assholes walking around with automatic rifles and tacticool pseudo military gear from Ebay? What a patriotic display! A bunch of people without clothes just biking around? The most threatening thing I've seen yet!
Lmao, Christians are too funny to me. Violence and murder, a-ok; little bit of nudity, "they're very threatening!"
I know, right? Like even as a kid the idea that Robocop (with some dude melting and getting smashed into a flesh smoothy) was just as bad as seeing a woman's boob was baffling. It still is as an adult.
He saw it on TV instead of through his porn accountability app. It was terrifying for him to not share his viewing with his son.
Oh yeah, he does that.
Uh, I'd have gone with those planes crashing into the WTC, but sure.
Or the lunatics assaulting our capital to keep a wannabe dictator in power
He's really thinking "All those cocks and not enough time to suck them all."
"Try not to suck any dick on your way through the parking lot."
/37
In a row??!?!!??!!
He needs to figure out the Mean Jerk Time.
Dicks out for democracy.
Tits out against tyranny.
What an impressively sheltered life he's lived.
What a fucking gimp lol... This is best laugh I've had in at least the month. The things these pussies are afraid of. Fucking lol
Did he not see Jan 6th 2021?
You mean that fake Jan 6 Antifa woke FBI mob that were unarmed and just peaceful tourists?
Unlike that nothing burger, where five people died...
This VIOLENT bike ride had DICKS out.
Right? I didn't see cyclists smear shit all over the place before leaving.
Their bike seats smell funny! I am not taking questions on why I'm sniffing strangers bike seats.
Reminds me of the naked warrior unit from Rome: Total war
Portland does this sort of thing every year. Clutch your pearls harder, you mushroom-fluffing fascist.
The only thing it threatened was your fragile sense of heterosexuality upon seeing all those chilly willies.
all those chilly willies
Yeah, I heard the weather was pretty bad this year. Ngl, though, I feel feel like my fragile sense of masculinity would be much more threatened by a bunch of massive flopping songs on a hot day, than it would be by a bunch of tiny chilly willies on a cold day.
...Hold up. Poor/middle class guys with small schlongs drive huge trucks and loud cars. Does this mean that rich guys with tiny tallywhackers go into politics?
How DARE they ~~KIDNAP CHILDREN AT GUNPOINT AND TAKE THEM TO UNDISCLOSED LOCATIONS AWAY FROM THEIR PARENTS OR LAWYERS!~~ RIDE BIKES NAKED!
I’m guessing he doesn’t know that New Orleans does this as well? In his home state? Nobody tell him.
“Most recently,” Johnson went on, “the most threatening thing I’ve seen yet was the naked bicyclers in Portland who were protesting ICE down there. I mean, it’s getting really ugly.”
Though the people behind him appeared to stifle a smile, it does not seem that he was joking, because he went on to say that protesters have attacked officers and people have been arrested.
The phrase "the most threatening thing I’ve seen yet was the naked bicyclers in Portland who were protesting ICE down there," cannot logically be anything except a defense of Portland. There is no other logical interpretation. It logically means that Portland has nothing more threatening than peaceful naked bicyclers. They can't even carry a concealed weapon.
But since Johnson is apparently disconnected from reality and basic logic, he can say something that defends Portland and pretend like it is a criticism of Portland. Is it even possible that he's so delusional that he believes what he's saying? No, I think it's very unlikely.
Even though the article says "it does not seem that he was joking," I still have trouble believing it. I have to convince myself that Mike Johnson wouldn't publicly defend Portland as being safe in order to believe that he wasn't joking.
But then, what am I left with? No human being over, say, 15, with reasonable intelligence, could think about that statement that Johnson said and believe he was telling the truth.
So, the explanation is that Mike Johnson is so used to getting away with lying that he'll just say anything. And meanwhile, his audience are so used to not thinking that they don't even call him on it.
can't even carry a concealed weapon
Not with that attitude.
Zap carry ftw
Doesn't he have a secret Grindr account? Somehow, I think he's seen worse.
No. Some no-name tik-toker claimed he had proof and threatened to reveal it, and then offered no evidence when the time came. But, the internet being what it is, people rolled with it because I guess the truth should never get in the way of a good story.