this post was submitted on 29 Oct 2025
307 points (99.0% liked)

Not The Onion

18491 readers
2984 users here now

Welcome

We're not The Onion! Not affiliated with them in any way! Not operated by them in any way! All the news here is real!

The Rules

Posts must be:

  1. Links to news stories from...
  2. ...credible sources, with...
  3. ...their original headlines, that...
  4. ...would make people who see the headline think, “That has got to be a story from The Onion, America’s Finest News Source.”

Please also avoid duplicates.

Comments and post content must abide by the server rules for Lemmy.world and generally abstain from trollish, bigoted, or otherwise disruptive behavior that makes this community less fun for everyone.

And that’s basically it!

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
top 32 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] Icytrees@lemmy.today 10 points 15 hours ago

Lawyers and judges saw a lot of dicks during covid when everyone had to learn how to video chat for court.

Everything from the accused laying in bed, in pajamas, with a bowl of cereal and a blunt, to mirrors betraying whole-moon asses, to a guy being charged with improper storage of a firearm with shotgun leaning against the wall behind him.

[–] klu9@piefed.social 6 points 15 hours ago

The court prohibits the wearing of shorts, skorts, sleeveless shirts, hats/caps (excluding ones worn for religious or cultural reasons) and “other clothing not suitable in a Court or any other professional environment.”

Well, he complied with that rule.

[–] quick_snail@feddit.nl 12 points 17 hours ago

I haven't worn pants for interviews in years.

Honestly wearing pants is weird.

[–] jqubed@lemmy.world 5 points 15 hours ago

Not wearing pants on camera is as old as TV itself. Always enjoyed this episode of Mayne Street highlighting this phenomenon and the problems when anchors no longer got to sit behind a desk. Also, rewatching this and realizing it has a couple people who would go into more noticeable roles on Parks and Recreation.

[–] Voroxpete@sh.itjust.works 3 points 13 hours ago

Of course it's Judge Sean Perkins. This poor bastard cannot catch a break.

[–] HubertManne@piefed.social 102 points 1 day ago (3 children)

Im not a big fan of law enforcement but boy am I sick of societies obsession with pants. Can't go anywhere without a pants nazi saying put some pants on and im like. no you. and they are like im wearing pants. and im all like well good for you then.

[–] JasonDJ@lemmy.zip 54 points 1 day ago (2 children)

...
...
CUZ THIS IS MY UNITED STATES OF WHATEVER.

[–] Dozzi92@lemmy.world 3 points 14 hours ago* (last edited 14 hours ago)

I went down to the beach and I saw Kiki, and she was all like awww, and I was like yeah, whatever!

[–] foggy@lemmy.world 26 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

And then I was like... At the mall or whatever and she was like "shouldnt you have some kinda like pants on or something?"

And I was like "yeah whatever!" 😏

[–] Akasazh@feddit.nl 1 points 17 hours ago

^this guy jorts

[–] rc__buggy@sh.itjust.works 7 points 1 day ago (1 children)

no shoes, no pants, no service.

A travesty.

Actually, I want shoes. No pants, no problem.

[–] PeacefulForest@lemmy.world 5 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Yeah I’m not leaving my house without shoes

[–] HubertManne@piefed.social 3 points 17 hours ago

oh I agree. Shoes are essential and socks if its cold out.

[–] trk@aussie.zone 18 points 1 day ago (1 children)

That video was actually worth the watch. I belly laughed at the incredulity of the judge... "You... You got some pants on there Officer??"....

Classic

Yeah, I was expecting some sort of accidental “Oops they saw my basketball shorts when I stood up” type of scenario. Instead, we straight up had Barry Wood greeting us.

[–] dhork@lemmy.world 59 points 1 day ago

Upon seeing Jackson’s state of dress, Judge Sean Perkins asked, “You got some pants on, officer?”

Jackson is seen replying, “No, sir,” before changing his camera’s framing so his lower body was no longer visible.

The rest of the hearing went on as planned.

At least he was polite about it

[–] tkk13909@sopuli.xyz 78 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I thought it was gonna be less obvious but nope, lack of pants was put on full display

[–] jqubed@lemmy.world 2 points 15 hours ago

Gotta keep your phone in landscape mode for the Zoom call!

[–] 0ndead@infosec.pub 26 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

This should grounds for immediate case dismissal

“your honor, my accuser can’t even be bothered to put on pants”

[–] SendMePhotos@lemmy.world 33 points 1 day ago

Good lord it was like a crotch shot.

[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 23 points 1 day ago

"Why am I not wearing pants? A better question is why are you wearing pants?"

[–] Aeao@lemmy.world 19 points 1 day ago

Not quite as good as “I’m not a cat” but funny

[–] ApeNo1@lemmy.world 8 points 1 day ago

Usually it is the defendant trying to get off during court proceedings.

[–] victorz@lemmy.world 9 points 1 day ago

Hey honey, how was your day at work?

Yeah you know.... It was aight.

[–] TropicalDingdong@lemmy.world 7 points 1 day ago

plot twist: he was zooming in from his squad car

[–] RedGreenBlue@lemmy.zip 3 points 1 day ago (3 children)

How is the off camera state of dress relevant? Why are they using cameras to begin with?

[–] SPRUNT@lemmy.world 7 points 17 hours ago (1 children)

Everything a cop or judge does should be on camera.

Because it was very much on camera. Rtfa

court cases are not phone calls

[–] Bot@sub.community 2 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I need to see that sausage

[–] InternetCitizen2@lemmy.world 11 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)