this post was submitted on 31 Jan 2025
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Greentext

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This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

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[–] BuboScandiacus@mander.xyz 2 points 1 day ago
[–] TootSweet@lemmy.world 137 points 2 weeks ago (6 children)

Shrimp > blockchain. Can't disagree with him there.

For that matter, shit is better than blockchain. Because at least shit is good for manure.

[–] NateNate60@lemmy.world 54 points 2 weeks ago (4 children)

Blockchain is the perfect solution to none of life's problems

[–] monk@lemmy.unboiled.info 1 points 3 days ago (1 children)

said another westerner who never needed to hide money from a government turning against them

[–] NateNate60@lemmy.world 1 points 3 days ago

Paper money doesn't exist

[–] riwo@lemmy.blahaj.zone 29 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

crypto currency is actually very useful when you need to buy meds that states dont want you to have. i dont know if blockchain is the best way to implement decentralized currencies (proof of work blockchain definitely isnt) but its what we got rn

[–] Stern@lemmy.world 27 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

To put it another way: Crypto is great for crime. Like I get that criminalizing stuff like HRT is bullshit, but...

[–] riwo@lemmy.blahaj.zone 27 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (1 children)

but what? be gay, do crime. legality has nothing to do with ethicality. dont support oppression and hegemonie!

[–] Th3D3k0y@lemmy.world 20 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Do crime? But what if I wanted to be President of the United States one day, surely there is some rule about having a criminal record?

[–] B0rax@feddit.org 8 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

You only have a criminal record if you get cought

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[–] EfreetSK@lemmy.world 16 points 2 weeks ago

I immediately took a look at the date. When I saw 2021, I said "Of course"

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[–] Donkter@lemmy.world 96 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

Anon discovers basic capitalism and lucked into an underserved market.

[–] Gradually_Adjusting@lemmy.world 29 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Isn't this technically just commerce? At least until he does an IPO.

[–] Donkter@lemmy.world 20 points 2 weeks ago

No? He's acquiring capital (land, shrimp farm equipment, shromps) and using his labor to create something (more shromps) and selling his product for a profit.

He owns the property, takes the investment risk, and keeps the profits. In theory he's competing in a market with other shrimp sellers but like I said from the sound of it the market is pretty thin so he gets to sell for a huge profit.

[–] superkret@feddit.org 25 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Anon also doesn't know about all applicable regulations and is yet to be audited by the IRS.
Anon discovered that you can earn money illegally until you're caught.

You can also earn money after you're caught, but the protection money will eat most of your profits.

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[–] Delphia@lemmy.world 95 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

I know a guy who bought a plot of almost worthless land an hour out of town fenced jt and bought a bunch of goats. We all thought he was insane.

10 years later he is retired at 40 because it turns out that certain communities will pay very good money for organic free range goat.

[–] superkret@feddit.org 52 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

There's multiple avenues how you can increase your wealth, if you have investment capital, and nothing goes wrong.

[–] SkyezOpen@lemmy.world 20 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] superkret@feddit.org 25 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Yeah, I also know a goat farmer in my neighborhood.
In the same 10 years, she faced an expensive lawsuit from someone who wanted her land, an epidemic that destroyed her herd, animals dying from people feeding them the wrong plants through the fence, Covid forcing her to close the farm to visitors, and other hardships.

She's barely out of the woods now, but definitely much worse off than if she had invested the money into stocks.

Yup, stocks are almost zero effort and have an expected return of 10-12% long term. Everything else is a job and is dependent on how good you are at managing it.

[–] UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 11 points 2 weeks ago

If you've got the time and the energy and the stomach to handle birthing and raising live goats, it is very profitable... for the person who got a large low-interest loan to set up the farm. Significantly less so for the people doing the actual agricultural labor.

[–] ShinkanTrain@lemmy.ml 60 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Anon gets shut down by the department of agriculture

[–] M1nds3nd@lemmy.ca 22 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Didn't Trump axe that one too?

[–] UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 49 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Unironically why small business goons love voting Republican.

You can brew mutant shrimp in a vat in your garage and take them to a wholesaler in a leaky bag labeled "Wild Caught Magic Beans" then sell them at some absurd markup. When half your customer base gets food poisoning, you blame DEI, throw down a smoke bomb, and run off with your profits.

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[–] Metz@lemmy.world 59 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (2 children)

And then you realize far too late that stuff like this is strictly regulated and you forgot to comply with all the standards for product safety and hygiene and the state is going to rip your ass so far open that a truck can make a u-turn it it.

[–] Corkyskog@sh.itjust.works 42 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Just do it in a red state and buy favor with the governor.

[–] sugar_in_your_tea@sh.itjust.works 24 points 2 weeks ago (6 children)

That's expensive. My governor is an alfalfa farmer in a desert state where alfalfa is ~1% of GDP and >50% of water use, or something like that. He's already a grifter, so getting my own grift approved is going to be expensive.

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[–] baines@lemmy.cafe 41 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

not anymore, how long until all that is doged out and we’re back to the jungle

[–] Tyfud@lemmy.world 10 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] baines@lemmy.cafe 11 points 2 weeks ago

took days for the faa to get fucked

[–] Blackout@fedia.io 55 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I tried the same thing with veal farming but little baby cows can't swim so good :|

[–] Ookami38@sh.itjust.works 24 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Give em a few generations, they'll learn.

[–] Corkyskog@sh.itjust.works 11 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (2 children)

Now I am just imagining someone breeding cows to get some kind of aquatic cow species. Which would also make a great band name.

[–] Oni_eyes@sh.itjust.works 14 points 2 weeks ago (4 children)
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[–] programmer_belch@lemmy.dbzer0.com 38 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] Shortstack@reddthat.com 12 points 2 weeks ago

Jesse, we need to produce more Balenciaga

[–] chonglibloodsport@lemmy.world 34 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

The one thing OP is missing is the type of shrimp. Don’t bother with food shrimp. That’s unprofitable! The real money is in fancy aquarium shrimp like these:

[–] burgersc12@mander.xyz 17 points 2 weeks ago

I have never wanted an aquarium shrimp before, but I think you just found yourself a customer sir!

[–] Flax_vert@feddit.uk 34 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

In America, just buy a load of chickens and do this with eggs.

[–] 2piradians@lemmy.world 26 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Silly goose, everyone knows shrimp is much more valuable than eg--

Heavens to betsy, you're right

[–] stringere@sh.itjust.works 10 points 2 weeks ago (4 children)
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[–] sugar_in_your_tea@sh.itjust.works 12 points 2 weeks ago (4 children)

I've looked into it, unless there's a bird flu epidemic, you're not going to be profitable. It's literally more expensive for me to raise chickens than buy eggs from across the company.

So I guess the solution is to spread bird flu?

[–] SatansMaggotyCumFart@lemmy.world 17 points 2 weeks ago

Be a true American and send the other farms infected chicken blankets.

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[–] ambitious_bones@lemmy.world 27 points 2 weeks ago

Relevant Mitchell &Webb sketch: Link

[–] UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 21 points 2 weeks ago

I bought all the equipment right from a Chinese seller for Tether

Had me right up until the end. Cryptobros literally do not understand how to do normal banking.

[–] abbotsbury@lemmy.world 16 points 2 weeks ago

this is literally the plot of Forrest Gump (the book)

[–] JayObey711@lemmy.world 15 points 2 weeks ago

This is actually true. A former landlord of mine made a fuck ton of money by farming koi fish in the basement of a warehouse.

[–] JackbyDev@programming.dev 14 points 2 weeks ago

Basement Gump

[–] sheepishly@fedia.io 10 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
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